Musings....

[PSM]

Chef, you kind of left the black truffles out of the tortilini recipe.

[Penn]

MR2: you are due a huge THANK YOU!!!!
I changed the short story title to “Butterfly Wings”

[MR2]

Originally Posted by Penn

MR2: you are due a huge THANK YOU!!!!
I changed the short story title to “Butterfly Wings”

You're most welcome. I'm looking forward to USPS delivering (anything).



EDIT: I guess I should start on my own 'Musings.' I'll call it "Swatting Lies and Swapping Flies" or How a 60-step pace count can get you anywhere.

[Badger52]

Originally Posted by MR2

EDIT: I guess I should start on my own 'Musings.' I'll call it "Swatting Lies and Swapping Flies" or How a 60-step pace count can get you anywhere.

I can see that; even a chapter about whether a slain sacred cow should be prepared for the table, or just left on the shoulder (critters gotta eat too).

[Penn]

On May 13th 2026, Dennis died living.

In many ways, it is the only outcome one would expect for his lived life.

From the time Korin and Dennis could sit on a big wheel tricycle, and reach the pedals, Dennis’s only concern was speed. I vividly remember chasing him all over the Chatham parking lot behind the restaurant, Dennis head down pedaling as fast as he could, me screaming stop, cars breaking, horns beeping, Dennis in his element, me in a cold sweat finally catching up, grabbing the bike, attempting to reason with him on the danger of riding in traffic, a wasted argument against his simile.

There are many, truly, many times I feared for him.

At 9 or 10 years of age, Dennis was playing Goalie for the Chatham Hockey Team. Matches were held in Bayonne. On one Saturday, the 14- to-18-year-old team needed a Goalie; Dennis at once volunteered for the opening. I try to prevent this from happening. Not only do I meet resistance from Dennis, but the teenagers stressing that he’ll be ok, I relent, but as the game progresses and the tempo increases, shots on goal are intense. These kids are shooting full force, and Dennis is deflecting and stopping shots at 80 to 100mph.

It was the moment when I realized that Dennis embraced a sense of invincibility.

That he could overcome every obstacle thrown at him.

All through grade school and into high school, there were many occasions as a single parent, I opted out of a full-blown confrontation, because I knew it was like water off a duck back. Useless to argue for a behavioral change.

For example: Coming home unexpectly one evening to change my chef coat and discover 100 plus HS friends partying and drinking in my house and yard on Kent Place Blvd, which solved the long-term mystery of why the furniture was always out of place, the party had been ongoing, as they knew my schedule prevented me from arriving home before 10PM.

After Graduating Summit HS and moving to the shore, Dennis enrolls in Ocean County Community College, Honor Student, Soccer Team Co-Captain and Member of a Championship Team.

During that time, we shared my artist loft—though to Dennis, it was a frat house, and he lived every single second of it. Jersey Shore girls tried smothering him with fast cars and affection, but it was a completely failed attempt to tame the beast.

Sometime around 2004, Dennis spoke to me about his interest in enlisting in the military, which, considering the many failed attempts to instill discipline, I told him he needed to really understand what the commitment was about, and that once you signed on the dotted line, there were no outs. Think long and hard before doing that.

Over the next year or so, we visited my former unit in the 20th Special Forces Group, a reserve unit that was attached to the Maryland National Guard. I told Dennis that the best way to discuss your interest in SF is to be just truthful, no BS, ask all the questions you want, do not expect any sort of enthusiasm in return.

Dennis enlisted in 2005. Entering as an18X, the MOS for Special Forces Trainee. The selection process is the tip of the spear; only the brightest and most adaptable survive the training. All of Dennis’s test scores are superior. Dennis volunteers for the Special Forces Medical course. The most difficult of all the SF MOS.

Before he can begin that training, He must attend and complete Basic, AIT, and Airborne (Jump) School. At the graduation ceremony, I had the honor of pining my Jump Wings on Dennis’s chest. It was a defining moment in our relationship as Father & Son.

In that regard, Dennis and I held a deep love and respect for each other; that love was both competitive in that he would challenge me at every opportunity and confrontational, my expectations vs his perspective of living in the moment, which always instilled fear in me as he whole heartly embraced that concept. He enjoyed living on the edge. It was not recklessness; it was his natural confidence in his innate ability to overcome any situation; he understood that. He did not explain anything; he acted.

While serving with the 20th Special Forces Group, Dennis was Awarded Maryland's Meritorious Service Medal for Saving the Lives of Three Officers Candidates; one was found hanging from a ledge of cliff unable to pull herself to safety. The Citation reads “SPC Foy immediately acted and proceeded to negotiate the cliffside without aid of equipment or regard for his own personal safety, extracted the Officer from the cliff and returned her to safety.”

On another occasion while a student in the Special Forces Medical Course, driving home one night Dennis witnessed a gang related shooting. He immediately stopped and began treating the individual who had been shot in the throat. Dennis worked on the individual for 25 minutes, clearing his airway, preventing him from going into shock and keeping him alive until the police and medical units arrived to take over.

Dennis deployed to war zones 5 times, twice to Afghanistan, once to Iraq, and twice to Africa with the state department, working with the French Foreign Legion. Dennis was a 2/2 fluent French speaker. When asked about his experience he never went into detail, would describe it as boring and sometimes wild, crazy stuff. Except for his Iraq deployment at Q-West where he experiences a mass causality event, Dennis description was body and limbs everywhere. The Army had targeted an ISSI formation on Qanuns Island. Dennis was part of the lead element to recon the Island after the strike. It is also where Dennis TBI occurred, resulting in his medical discharge and 100% VA disability rating.

We had many conversations during his 17 years in the Army. His evaluation reports are exemplary. His letters of recommendation and citations all note his leadership and command skills, and his ability to work with others. As a Father and Veteran, it does not get better than that.

Over the past few years, for some unknown reason, I saved the texts that we exchanged between us. They cover the full range of emotions that we shared between us. There are several where Dennis presents a perspective that life is experienced in various levels of Vibrations, that life exists within those vibrations and does not end when we leave this physical form, but continues. Remembering the conversations and reading those text exchanges now sooths my soul, silencing the fear with the acceptance of the unknown. In that sense, Dennis has given us an immeasurable gift, that of a Sylphide to stand by our side and to keep us forever warm.



On Father's Day 2025 Dennis sent me this:



Despite everything we’ve been through-

The ugly, the bad, the angry, and the sad-

You never quit showing up.

Even when it was thankless.

Even when it hurt.

You carried the weight anyway.



I see it now. I see you



“Let us not grow weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6-9



You livid that verse long before I understood it.

And no matter what’s come between us,

I’ll always be proud to call you, my father.

Happy Father's Day. I love you.



That is the hard part, having reached the peaceful and beautiful understanding of the love we shared for each other, transitioned the two of us as Father & Son to friendship and mutual admiration.



I will miss My Son Dennis for the rest of my days.

[Penn]

On May 13th 2026, Dennis died living.

In many ways, it is the only outcome one would expect for his lived life.

From the time Korin and Dennis could sit on a big wheel tricycle, and reach the pedals, Dennis’s only concern was speed. I vividly remember chasing him all over the Chatham parking lot behind the restaurant, Dennis head down pedaling as fast as he could, me screaming stop, cars breaking, horns beeping, Dennis in his element, me in a cold sweat finally catching up, grabbing the bike, attempting to reason with him on the danger of riding in traffic, a wasted argument against his simile.

There are many, truly, many times I feared for him.

At 9 or 10 years of age, Dennis was playing Goalie for the Chatham Hockey Team. Matches were held in Bayonne. On one Saturday, the 14- to-18-year-old team needed a Goalie; Dennis at once volunteered for the opening. I try to prevent this from happening. Not only do I meet resistance from Dennis, but the teenagers stressing that he’ll be ok, I relent, but as the game progresses and the tempo increases, shots on goal are intense. These kids are shooting full force, and Dennis is deflecting and stopping shots at 80 to 100mph.

It was the moment when I realized that Dennis embraced a sense of invincibility.

That he could overcome every obstacle thrown at him.

All through grade school and into high school, there were many occasions as a single parent, I opted out of a full-blown confrontation, because I knew it was like water off a duck back. Useless to argue for a behavioral change.

For example: Coming home unexpectly one evening to change my chef coat and discover 100 plus HS friends partying and drinking in my house and yard on Kent Place Blvd, which solved the long-term mystery of why the furniture was always out of place, the party had been ongoing, as they knew my schedule prevented me from arriving home before 10PM.

After Graduating Summit HS and moving to the shore, Dennis enrolls in Ocean County Community College, Honor Student, Soccer Team Co-Captain and Member of a Championship Team.

During that time, we shared my artist loft—though to Dennis, it was a frat house, and he lived every single second of it. Jersey Shore girls tried smothering him with fast cars and affection, but it was a completely failed attempt to tame the beast.

Sometime around 2004, Dennis spoke to me about his interest in enlisting in the military, which, considering the many failed attempts to instill discipline, I told him he needed to really understand what the commitment was about, and that once you signed on the dotted line, there were no outs. Think long and hard before doing that.

Over the next year or so, we visited my former unit in the 20th Special Forces Group, a reserve unit that was attached to the Maryland National Guard. I told Dennis that the best way to discuss your interest in SF is to be just truthful, no BS, ask all the questions you want, do not expect any sort of enthusiasm in return.

Dennis enlisted in 2005. Entering as an18X, the MOS for Special Forces Trainee. The selection process is the tip of the spear; only the brightest and most adaptable survive the training. All of Dennis’s test scores are superior. Dennis volunteers for the Special Forces Medical course. The most difficult of all the SF MOS.

Before he can begin that training, He must attend and complete Basic, AIT, and Airborne (Jump) School. At the graduation ceremony, I had the honor of pining my Jump Wings on Dennis’s chest. It was a defining moment in our relationship as Father & Son.

In that regard, Dennis and I held a deep love and respect for each other; that love was both competitive in that he would challenge me at every opportunity and confrontational, my expectations vs his perspective of living in the moment, which always instilled fear in me as he whole heartly embraced that concept. He enjoyed living on the edge. It was not recklessness; it was his natural confidence in his innate ability to overcome any situation; he understood that. He did not explain anything; he acted.

While serving with the 20th Special Forces Group, Dennis was Awarded Maryland's Meritorious Service Medal for Saving the Lives of Three Officers Candidates; one was found hanging from a ledge of cliff unable to pull herself to safety. The Citation reads “SPC Foy immediately acted and proceeded to negotiate the cliffside without aid of equipment or regard for his own personal safety, extracted the Officer from the cliff and returned her to safety.”

On another occasion while a student in the Special Forces Medical Course, driving home one night Dennis witnessed a gang related shooting. He immediately stopped and began treating the individual who had been shot in the throat. Dennis worked on the individual for 25 minutes, clearing his airway, preventing him from going into shock and keeping him alive until the police and medical units arrived to take over.

Dennis deployed to war zones 5 times, twice to Afghanistan, once to Iraq, and twice to Africa with the state department, working with the French Foreign Legion. Dennis was a 2/2 fluent French speaker. When asked about his experience he never went into detail, would describe it as boring and sometimes wild, crazy stuff. Except for his Iraq deployment at Q-West where he experiences a mass causality event, Dennis description was body and limbs everywhere. The Army had targeted an ISSI formation on Qanuns Island. Dennis was part of the lead element to recon the Island after the strike. It is also where Dennis TBI occurred, resulting in his medical discharge and 100% VA disability rating.

We had many conversations during his 17 years in the Army. His evaluation reports are exemplary. His letters of recommendation and citations all note his leadership and command skills, and his ability to work with others. As a Father and Veteran, it does not get better than that.

Over the past few years, for some unknown reason, I saved the texts that we exchanged between us. They cover the full range of emotions that we shared between us. There are several where Dennis presents a perspective that life is experienced in various levels of Vibrations, that life exists within those vibrations and does not end when we leave this physical form, but continues. Remembering the conversations and reading those text exchanges now sooths my soul, silencing the fear with the acceptance of the unknown. In that sense, Dennis has given us an immeasurable gift, that of a Sylphide to stand by our side and to keep us forever warm.



On Father's Day 2025 Dennis sent me this:



Despite everything we’ve been through-

The ugly, the bad, the angry, and the sad-

You never quit showing up.

Even when it was thankless.

Even when it hurt.

You carried the weight anyway.



I see it now. I see you



“Let us not grow weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Galatians 6-9



You livid that verse long before I understood it.

And no matter what’s come between us,

I’ll always be proud to call you, my father.

Happy Father's Day. I love you.



That is the hard part, having reached the peaceful and beautiful understanding of the love we shared for each other, transitioned the two of us as Father & Son to friendship and mutual admiration.



I will miss My Son Dennis for the rest of my days.