Why Does America Have So Many 'Peter Pan' Men?

[BMT (RIP)]

http://www.foxnews.com/opinion/2011/...peter-pan-men/

Ok ladies here is one for you!!!

BMT

[Requiem]

Feminism is only part of it. I think a big part of why men are softer these days is the shift from rural living to urban living. In 1950 the rural population was 40% and urban was 60%. Today it's 20% rural and 80% urban. (Source)

Urban man is more worried about getting his suit from the cleaners and making the commute to his air-conditioned office. He gets fit in a gym, not by working hard.

I do think television and movies have done a big disservice to men. There's hardly a male role that isn't the butt of jokes, the weakling, the idiot. The female roles are strong and smart (okay, there's dumb and sexy too). The child roles are there to show just how stupid "dad" is and how clever the kid is. (The exception was television like Cosby, who was a strong male father figure and black to boot.)

I'm familiar with the water-cooler women's talk about the lack of great men. I didn't find a good one until I was 32. Where the hell are you guys?

Paslode, sir, I appreciate your post about having a strong male in the family. Absolutely! There are too many homes without real men in them. Boys learn to be men by example.

Susan

[Paslode]

Originally Posted by Requiem

Feminism is only part of it. I think a big part of why men are softer these days is the shift from rural living to urban living. In 1950 the rural population was 40% and urban was 60%. Today it's 20% rural and 80% urban. (Source)

Urban man is more worried about getting his suit from the cleaners and making the commute to his air-conditioned office. He gets fit in a gym, not by working hard.

I do think television and movies have done a big disservice to men. There's hardly a male role that isn't the butt of jokes, the weakling, the idiot. The female roles are strong and smart (okay, there's dumb and sexy too). The child roles are there to show just how stupid "dad" is and how clever the kid is. (The exception was television like Cosby, who was a strong male father figure and black to boot.)

I'm familiar with the water-cooler women's talk about the lack of great men. I didn't find a good one until I was 32. Where the hell are you guys?

Paslode, sir, I appreciate your post about having a strong male in the family. Absolutely! There are too many homes without real men in them. Boys learn to be men by example.

Susan

Mom was no slouch.....she just had her own priorities for setting examples.

At age 12 she put my summer dreams of hanging out at the pool and sucking face with the honey's to a to a quick end.....8 hours a day, 5 days a week of picking up tenants trash, shitty diapers out of window wells, rocks, pulling weeds, watering shrubs, mowing and all the other crap no one wanted to do...and I had to be on site by 7:30AM to set an example that family didn't mean you got any slack.

That said, based on how those of us who were required to participate in the family business versus those who weren't required to participate....those of us who did are doing fine, those that didn't not so well.


I think that might fit into the urban versus rural class.


Somethings I hear quite often during my daily grind with customers, the majority of which are women who are either self-sufficient or have married into a comfortable lifestyle.


You're like my Dad

My Dad was a carpenter, plumber, farmer, etc.

My Dad did things like that.

I wish my husband/boyfriend could do that.

My husband/boyfriend doesn't know the working end of a screw driver.

My husband/boyfriend is good at making money but he can barely put a light bulb in.


Some of them are actually kind of annoyed their better half is mechanically inept.



My take......if you can provide financial security along with a big house, fancy dinners, vacations and new cars, and you can accomplish this getting dirty with a touch of savagery and you know proper etiquette.....You maybe the perfect man.

[Requiem]

Originally Posted by Paslode

My take......if you can provide financial security along with a big house, fancy dinners, vacations and new cars, and you can accomplish this getting dirty with a touch of savagery and you know proper etiquette.....You maybe the perfect man.

Gosh. You should write romance novels. That's exactly what the lusty heroines are looking for. (You forgot that he also has to be Highly Skilled in the bedroom.)

Kudos to your mother for raising you to be responsible, honorable and hardworking. Those qualities go along way with women. It's what we want, with kindness, a little adventure and... adoration.

You hit on something - some girls DO look for a guy who is like their daddy. Especially if daddy was their hero. It's hard to find a guy who lives up to that hero status. (Same could be said for men looking for someone that lives up to mom's standards.) But there we are - back to square one: where are all the real guys these days?

Susan

[GratefulCitizen]

Originally Posted by Requiem

Gosh. You should write romance novels. That's exactly what the lusty heroines are looking for. (You forgot that he also has to be Highly Skilled in the bedroom.)

Kudos to your mother for raising you to be responsible, honorable and hardworking. Those qualities go along way with women. It's what we want, with kindness, a little adventure and... adoration.

Could've swore that I overheard women saying something about a sharp wit and a quick tongue.

[Requiem]

Originally Posted by GratefulCitizen

Could've swore that I overheard women saying something about a sharp wit and a quick tongue.

[MR2]

Valour is still value. The first duty for a man is still that of subduing Fear. We must get rid of Fear; we cannot act at all till then.
- Thomas Carlyle, On Heroes, Hero-Worship and the Heroic in History

[The Reaper]

Because of the neutering and pussification of the American male.

Feel good, do nothing policies from the liberal left. Diversity programs. Affirmative action. inEqual opportunity programs. Special "protected" categories of citizens. Some animals are more equal than others.

Apologies for being a man, and acting like one.

Who is John Galt?

TR

[Roguish Lawyer]

Originally Posted by The Reaper

Because of the neutering and pussification of the American male.

Feel good, do nothing policies from the liberal left. Diversity programs. Affirmative action. inEqual opportunity programs. Special "protected" categories of citizens. Somne animals are more equal than others.

Apologies for being a man, and acting like one.

Who is John Galt?

TR

Preach on, brother!

[Dusty]

Society has set up the typical American male as a snivelling milquetoast with Mitty disease. Feminists have had a lot to do with forming that stereotype.

Doesn't mean you gotta act like one, yourself. And not all women are feminists.

A woman is like a gun. Fun, but dangerous.

[Paslode]

Originally Posted by Dusty

Society has set up the typical American male as a snivelling milquetoast with Mitty disease.

I look at school. When I was in grade school boys we rough and tumble, we played mean games like dodge ball with the sole intent of getting a head shot, tackle football was allowed at recess, we had fist fights on the play ground, we were allowed pockets knives on school grounds, we all watched Combat and Rat Patrol and drew warfare cartoons at art depicting amputation, blood and core in art class....if you didn't tow that line you were considered a Mommas Boy and alienated. If you took it too far, you went to the Principles office for a visit with the Board of Education.....and if you didn't head the advice of the Board of education you got expelled.

With exception to art and what violence we watched on TV nothing much change in Middle School through High School. In fact, in High School it was quite common to see rifles and shotguns in students pickups....and that was a city school.

And throughout those 13 violent filled years of public education....no one got shot or stabbed..... and with exception to the Middle School I was integrated into, very rarely were teachers ever talked back to and none were ever threatened.

Now days it is the counter opposite.

[Dusty]

Originally Posted by Paslode

I look at school. When I was in grade school boys we rough and tumble, we played mean games like dodge ball with the sole intent of getting a head shot, tackle football was allowed at recess, we had fist fights on the play ground, we were allowed pockets knives on school grounds, we all watched Combat and Rat Patrol and drew warfare cartoons at art depicting amputation, blood and core in art class....if you didn't tow that line you were considered a Mommas Boy and alienated. If you took it too far, you went to the Principles office for a visit with the Board of Education.....and if you didn't head the advice of the Board of education you got expelled.

With exception to art and what violence we watched on TV nothing much change in Middle School through High School. In fact, in High School it was quite common to see rifles and shotguns in students pickups....and that was a city school.

And throughout those 13 violent filled years of public education....no one got shot or stabbed..... and with exception to the Middle School I was integrated into, very rarely were teachers ever talked back to and none were ever threatened.

Now days it is the counter opposite.

Our freedoms are eroding faster and faster. This "level playing field" bullshit is rotting our collective core.

[Paslode]

Originally Posted by Dusty

Our freedoms are eroding faster and faster. This "level playing field" bullshit is rotting our collective core.

I believe you can chalk some of the problem to homes were the home is devoid of a father i.e. a masculine influence.

For example I will use my son and myself.

If I hadn't had a Dad that was into fishing, hunting, guns and knives...Mom would have never let me close to a gun and I probably wouldn't have been carrying a pocket knife. My son wouldn't have been allowed to have either had I not been around. And just like me and all my cousins he cut himself with his first pocket knife within the first week....he hasn't done it since. I've taught him firearm safety just like my dad taught me.

Mention firearms and killing game around my hood in public and there's a good chance you'll get some odd looks.....were are Hamburgers made? McDonalds of course. Eggs come from Hen House.

The one thing I am not allowed to do (to keep in good graces with the School Gods) is to encourage my son or his sister to kick the shit out of anyone that hits them.....they are just supposed to put up with and tell the teacher....and that is acceptable to my kids peers and most parents. You might even get in trouble by even mentioning the possibility of hitting back.

Whereas, my buddies would have called me a pussy for tattling to the teacher, and it wouldn't have sit well with my Dad either....Mom would have said I did the right thing. Dad would have said, You need to stand up for yourself son, you can't rely on others to do it for you.

These days if kids were having a dirt clod fight someone would dial 911.

Despite having a clotting time of 30 minutes plus, Dad encourage me to be a boy, learn the lessons associated with the experiences. Mom generally conceded and prayed it all went well.....She could have turned me into a Mommas Boy if Dad hadn't been around.


Another facet is getting sweaty and dirty....

Everyone in my family worked and got their hands filthy. Dirt, Grime and sweat is what payed the bills and did you proud. You walked in the house with your shoes on or through the back door if you were muddy. Playing in the mud and rain, stamping puddles were all encouraged by both my parents.

Now days, there is an increasing aversion to dirt...most people stay indoors when it rains....most folks seem to want to stay clean, dry and seemingly safe from something.....and if you don't use some antibacterial soap before every meal and after every time you touch something, then you're the odd person out.

And now when it sprinkles it time to come in and play inside......rain never stopped us from playing outside, in fact it made it more fun!

[Dusty]

Originally Posted by Paslode

The one thing I am not allowed to do (to keep in good graces with the School Gods) is to encourage my son or his sister to kick the shit out of anyone that hits them.....they are just supposed to put up with and tell the teacher....and that is acceptable to my kids peers and most parents. You might even get in trouble by even mentioning the possibility of hitting back.

Your point as well as a major symptom of decay in our society illustrated here:

http://www.foxnews.com/us/2012/04/19...est=latestnews


A 9-year-old Colorado boy claims he was suspended from his elementary school after fighting back against a bully who was beating him.

Nathan Pemberton, a third-grader at West Elementary School in Colorado Springs, was suspended Tuesday following a physical altercation with another student, Fox affiliate KDVR-TV reported.

"One kid kicked me in the back, then punched me in the face. Then I punched him in the face and then I got in trouble," the boy told the station.

The boys parents said their son has repeatedly complained of being bullied at school.

"Finally, yeah, we told him, if you have to, if there’s nobody else around, you do what you have to do," said his mother, Deborah Pemberton.

"The school had told us and told him as well, just walk away. Walk away, find a teacher," Pemberton said. "Well, when those things happened, and he did find a teacher, there was hardly any repercussions."

A school released a statement to the station saying that the district has a "no tolerance student discipline policy."

"If a student is involved in a physical altercation on school property, they are automatically suspended," the statement said. "District 11 schools employ many anti-bullying teaching techniques … and none of these methods include violence or retaliation."

Snip

[33army]

I can't remember where I heard this statistic, but a recent study has shown that men today have on average 20% less testosterone than men did 20 years ago.


Not the source of the above statistic but along the same lines...

http://naturalsociety.com/masculinit...n-the-decline/