Found in Fortune Cookies

[Dozer523]

-- Passionate kiss like spider's web. Soon lead to undoing of fly.

-- Virginity like bubble. One prick, all gone.

-- Man who run in front of car get tired.

-- Man who run behind car get exhausted.

-- Foolish man give wife grand piano. Wise man give wife upright organ.

-- Man who walk thru airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.

-- Man with one chopstick go hungry.

-- Man who scratches butt should not bite fingernails.

-- Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.

-- Baseball is wrong -- man with four balls cannot walk.

-- War doesn't determine who is right. War determines who is left.

-- Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cathouse.

[bubba]

-- Man who go to bed with itchy butt, wake up with poopy finger.

[Richard]

Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.

Crowded elevator smell different to midget.

Panties not best thing on earth...but next to best thing on earth.

Richard's $.02