A successful New York City trial lawyer goes on a duck hunting trip in Mississippi. He finally shoots a duck, but it lands just over a fence separating the hunting area from a farm. Thinking nothing of it, he jumps the fence and goes to pick up the duck.
The owner of the farm sees him come over the fence and runs over.
"What the hell do ya think yer doin, boy?"
"I'm just retrieving the duck I shot," replies the lawyer.
"Oh no, yer not," says the farmer.
"Look, sir. I don't think you know who you're dealing with here. I'm a trial lawyer, and if you don't give me that duck, I'm going SUE YOUR ASS!"
"That's not how we settle disputes down here, Mister," says the farmer. We settle our disputes with the three-kick."
"What's that?," the lawyer asks.
"We take turns kicking each other three times until someone gives up."
"OK," says the lawyer. "Sounds fine to me."
"I'll start," says the farmer. And he kicks the living shit out of the lawyer three times, then starts walking away.
"Where do you think you're going?," the lawyer asks.
"Oh, you can have the duck."
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