British Hospitality

[BMT (RIP)]

An American tourist in London decides to skip his tour group and explore the
city on his own. He wanders around, seeing the sights, and occasionally
stopping at a quaint pub to soak up the local culture, chat with the lads,
and have a pint of Guinness.

After a while, he finds himself in a very high class neighborhood--big,
stately residences; no pubs; no stores; no restaurants; and, worst of all,
no public restrooms. He really, really has to go after all those Guinness's.
He finds a narrow side street with high walls surrounding the adjacent
buildings,
and decides to use the wall to solve his problem.

As he is unzipping, he's tapped on the shoulder by a London Bobbie who says,
"I say, sir, you simply cannot do that here, you know." "I'm very sorry,
officer," replies the American, "but I really, really HAVE TO GO, and I just
can't find a public restroom."

Ah, yes," said the Bobbie, "Just follow me." He leads him to a back
"delivery alley," then along a wall to a gate, which he opens. "In there,"
points the Bobbie. "Whiz away. Anywhere you want."

The fellow enters and finds himself in the most beautiful garden he has ever
seen. Manicured grass lawns, statuary, fountains, sculptured hedges, and
huge beds of gorgeous flowers, all in perfect bloom. Since he has the cop's
blessing, he zips down and unburdens himself and is greatly relieved. As he
goes
back through the gate, he says to the Bobbie, "That was really decent of
you. Is that
'British hospitality?'"

"No," replied the Bobbie with a satisfied smile on his face, "That is the
French Embassy."