Monkey to Join SWAT Team

[MinerDiver]

MESA, Ariz. (AP) - Police tactical units usually don't engage in a lot of monkey business, but one SWAT team wants to add a capuchin monkey to its staff.
"Everybody laughs about it until they really start thinking about it," said Sean Truelove, an officer with the Mesa Police Department who builds and operates tactical robots for the unit in suburban Phoenix.

Truelove said the department is trying to obtain a capuchin, considered the second smartest primate behind the chimpanzee, with about $100,000 in grant money.

Truelove says the monkey, which alone would cost $15,000, could become the ultimate SWAT reconnaissance tool. Capuchins are small, weighing between 3 and 8 pounds, have tiny humanlike hands and puzzle-solving skills. He said the monkey could be trained to unlock doors and search buildings.

Since 1979, capuchin monkeys have been trained as companions for quadriplegics, performing daily tasks such as serving food, opening and closing doors, turning lights on and off, and retrieving objects and brushing hair.

Truelove hopes the same training could prepare a monkey for special-ops intelligence.

Weighing only 3 to 8 pounds with tiny humanlike hands and puzzle-solving skills, Truelove said it could unlock doors, search buildings and find suicide victims on command. Dressed in a Kevlar vest, video camera and two-way radio, the small monkey would be able to get into places no officer or robot could go.

It has been a little over a year since Truelove filed a grant proposal with the U.S. Department of Defense under the Defense Advanced Research Projects Agency, and he is still waiting for word.

If the grant goes through, Truelove plans on learning how to train the monkey himself and keeping the sociable monkey at home, just like a K-9 officer would. He projects that $85,000 in grant money would outfit the monkey with gear and pay for veterinarian care, food and habitat for three years.

18B - you better watch out...

(Copyright 2005 by The Associated Press. All Rights Reserved.)

[Cincinnatus]

"considered the second smartest primate behind the chimpanzee"

I would've thought humans would make the top two, then again, considering some of the things that I've seen humans do, perhaps not.

[jatx]

Why do they need a TWO-way radio? Will the officer be communicating in monkey-speak, or will he perhaps train the monkey to speak English?

Things I would train a monkey to do:

1. Walk the dog
2. Scratch my back
3. Answer the front door when a deliveryman comes
4. PowerPoint
5. Scrub toilets

[Sdiver]

Originally Posted by MinerDiver

Truelove hopes the same training could prepare a monkey for special-ops intelligence.

So does that mean there's going to be a NEW 18 series ???

18F-P....P For Primate.

[MinerDiver]

Originally Posted by Sdiver

So does that mean there's going to be a NEW 18 series ???

18F-P....P For Primate.

No - it will be a 18 M. This is going to replace the obsolete 18 B series.

[Trip_Wire (RIP)]

SWAT Monkey!

Wow! I hope it works for SWAT! I can see that as the robot for EOD does wonders, the monkey might do the same for them as well. The EOD people will then have a real living "Leroy."

Most of our EOD robots were armed with shotguns and water cannons. We always were available to our SWAT unit for checking out hostage/barricade situations. Although we never used the shotgun (12 Ga Remington 1100) to dispatch a suspect, we were always prepared to do so. I think it has been done at least once by a LE agency here in the USA. (Robot eliminates hostage taker remotely.)

Now, do we give the money a shotgun or pistol? I'd say a pistol would be right sizewise, but do we really want a money armed with a pistol shooting at people? I think I rather stick with the robot myself.

Come to think of it though, I had a couple of people on my SWAT team for a short time that would make the monkey look good to me.

[CPTAUSRET]

"Monkey Stomping", who better than a monkey to teach NDD's favorite martial art.

Terry

[Guy]

Wait until the first "monkey" gets KIA'd then PETA will have a fit!

[jatx]

Originally Posted by Trip_Wire

Now, do we give the money a shotgun or pistol? I'd say a pistol would be right sizewise, but do we really want a money armed with a pistol shooting at people?

TW, their hands are really little. I don't think any commercial firearm would be small enough and still of sufficient caliber. How about throwing knives - FrontSight could even make them! FS, you could make little monkey sheath sticks for them to wear between their shoulder blades. Now that's a SWAT monkey!

BTW, who makes a kevlar vest that small?

[Razor]

She could, but she'd need help in picking the monkey-sized knives up and putting them in boxes for shipment.

[jatx]

Originally Posted by Razor

She could, but she'd need help in picking the monkey-sized knives up and putting them in boxes for shipment.

Maybe she needs a monkey, too. In addition to packing and shipping duties, she could teach it to give dirty looks and lizard squiggle. It could even help her get ready in the morning!

[jatx]

Pic 1: Simunitions have proven very effective at preparing monkeys for battle.
Pic 2: A pistol ideally suited for monkeys.
Pic 3: Full battle rattle. Lighfighter will soon have the TMD (Tactical Monkey Diaper) available in MultiCam.

[EX-Gold Falcon]

PLEASE!

ALl of you are completely missing the true potential of the Monkey.

Goverment Service.

No longer will military recruiters be required to waste their time visiting High School after High School. Not if they can consolidate their potential enlistment pool at the local zoo!

Better yet, send recruiters to Africa and promise potential new soldiers in the battle against terrorism, American Monkey Citizenship.

Though of course they will be required to serve a minimum of 10 yrs or be killed in combat; which ever comes first.

Try to think out of the box here people...


Travis

[CRad]

Originally Posted by Guy

Wait until the first "monkey" gets KIA'd then PETA will have a fit!

They'll care only if someone tries to eat it afterwards.