02-26-2005, 00:10
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#1
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Guerrilla
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Seattle
Posts: 199
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Magic weapons
Bob was joining the Army and they were handing out rifles when he arrived, so he got in line. When it got to Bob, they had run out of weapons. The man issuing rifles gave him a broom.
"This is a magic broom -- point it at anybody, say 'Bangity bangity bang,' and they will die."
Bob was really worried because he didn't think it would work, but he got in line for bayonets, thinking he might stand a chance if he could stab them to death. As luck would have it, Bob's turn came and they had ran out.
"Don't worry." said the man issuing them out. "I will give you this magic carrot -- point it at somebody, say 'Stabbity stabbity stab,' and they will die." Now Bob is terrified, going into battle with a broom and carrot, when the sirens go off, signaling invasion.
Bob goes out, only to be laughed at by the enemy. One enemy even comes up to him, hoping to get a good shot at him. Well, Bob didn't have anything to lose so he pointed at him and said "Bangity bangity bang!" and the guy fell down dead. He did the same thing with the magic carrot. Amazed at what was happening, he continued to fight.
Then, a guy came slowly up to him and he would not die. Bob tried to shoot and stab him, but he wouldn't die. The last words poor Bob heard as he was being
trampled over were "Tankity tankity tank."
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Maytime is offline
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02-26-2005, 00:50
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#2
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Area Commander
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: The Black Hills of SD
Posts: 5,943
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In that case.....I'm going to end this battle....
Nukeity, Nukeity, Nuke. 
__________________
Non Sibi Sed Suis
_____________________________________________
It's Good To Be Da King !!!! Just ask NDD !!!! 
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Sdiver is offline
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02-26-2005, 00:51
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#3
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Guerrilla
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Ryndon, NV
Posts: 339
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Damn, dude. You're the bomb.
__________________
"I have seen much war in my lifetime and I hate it profoundly. But there are things worse than war; and all of them come with defeat." -- Hemingway
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DanUCSB is offline
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02-26-2005, 06:05
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#4
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Moderator
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Central Florida
Posts: 3,045
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by DanUCSB
Damn, dude. You're the bomb. |
We need a "groan" emoticon.
__________________
"Are you listening or just waiting to talk?"
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
"Fate rarely calls upon us at a moment of our choosing."
Optimus Prime
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Kyobanim is offline
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02-26-2005, 14:24
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#5
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Guerrilla
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Seattle
Posts: 199
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Quote:
In that case.....I'm going to end this battle....
Nukeity, Nukeity, Nuke.
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Watch it, the UN might send you a nasty letter. 
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Maytime is offline
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02-26-2005, 19:00
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#6
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Guerrilla Chief
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Vancouver (Not BC), Washington (Not DC)
Posts: 505
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Maytime
Watch it, the UN might send you a nasty letter. |
You have to use 3-4 of them before they do that. 1st offense and they consider thinking about considering a plan to consider a list of their alternatives to doing anything.
__________________
"How can a pacifist, tolerant anti-violence, anti-hunting, anti Second Amendment, anti-self-defense group turn to violence against a party that is pro- all of that?" - The Reaper, 11Oct04 14:42hrs
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Bravo1-3 is offline
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02-28-2005, 13:41
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#7
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Guerrilla
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: Southern Puget Sound
Posts: 302
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Kyobanim
We need a "groan" emoticon.
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amen to that
__________________
War is an ugly thing, but not the ugliest of things. The decayed and degraded state of moral and patriotic feeling which thinks that nothing is worth war is much worse.
--John Stewart Mill--
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Weazle23 is offline
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02-28-2005, 14:33
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#8
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Quiet Professional
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Castle Rock, CO
Posts: 2,531
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Bravo1-3
You have to use 3-4 of them before they do that. 1st offense and they consider thinking about considering a plan to consider a list of their alternatives to doing anything.
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and even then, leaflets will be dropped long before action is taken...
__________________
""A man must know his destiny. if he does not recognize it, then he is lost. By this I mean, once, twice, or at the very most, three times, fate will reach out and tap a man on the shoulder. if he has the imagination, he will turn around and fate will point out to him what fork in the road he should take, if he has the guts, he will take it.""- GEN George S. Patton
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lksteve is offline
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