|
Quiet Professional
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: State of Confusion
Posts: 5,866
|
I wish all of my Christian friends a very merry Christmas and a very happy new year.
To all of my Jewish friends, chag sameach.
To those of you celebrating Kwanzaa this year, Habari Gani!
I hope everyone has enjoyed National Christmas Lights Day, World AIDS Day, Romanian Independence Day, Rosa Parks Day, Peppermint Bark Day, International Day for the Abolition of Slavery, National Bartender Day, World Pollution Prevention Day, World Computer Literacy Day, National Green Bean Casserole Day, Ghana Farmer’s Day, International Cheetah Day, International Day of Banks, National Cookie Day, Santa’s List Day, World Wildlife Conservation Day, International Ninja Day, International Volunteer Day, National Blue Jeans Day, Thailand Father’s Day, National Gazpacho Day, National Miners Day, Walt Disney Day, National Cotton Candy Day, National Illinois Day, National Joy Day, Pearl Harbor Day of Remembrance, National Letter Writing Day, Immaculate Conception Day, National Blue Collar Day, National Brownie Day, Panama Mother’s Day, Pretend To Be A Time Traveler Day (one of my personal favorites - and it has been ever since I hooked up with a lady in waiting from the dark ages, a Thought Police Technical Advisor from the year 3006, and a prehistoric hottie in a deerskin bikini named Loanna in One Million BC - all in the same day). I also wish you all a happy Christmas Card Day, Lost and Found Day, Genocide Prevention Day (please - help prevent that shit, it's only going to get worse if you dont); a happy National Llama Day, National Pastry Day, Techno Day, Tanzania Independence Day, Dewey Decimal System Day, International Animal Rights Day, National Lager Day, Human Rights Day, Nobel Prize Day, National App Day, Burkina Faso Republic Day, UNICEF Day for Change, Gingerbread Decorating Day, National Ambrosia Day, National Poinsettia Day, Our Lady of Guadalupe Day, Thailand Constitution Day, Worldwide Candle Lighting Day, Universal Health Coverage Day, National Cocoa Day, National Day of Saint Lucia, National Violin Day, National Cream Cheese Frosting Day, National Horse Day, National Ice Cream Day (which I am sure will be enjoyed by our elitist 12-dollar-a-quart-ice cream quaffing crooked politicians).
I hope everyone had a great National Energy Conservation Day, Roast Chestnuts Day, National Free Shipping Day, National Cat Herders Day, National Re-Gifting Day, International Tea Day, Bill of Rights Day, National Cupcake Day, Day of Reconciliation, National Chocolate Covered Anything Day, Stupid Toy Day, Underdog Day, Canadian Maple Syrup Day, National Ugly Sweater Day, Wright Brother's Day, National Wreaths Across America Day, Bake Cookies Day, Flake Appreciation Day, National Twin Day, Qatar National Day, International Migrants Day, Answer The Telephone Like Buddy The Elf Day, National Hard Candy Day, National Heroes and Heroines Day, Look for an Evergreen Day, National Emo Day, Go Caroling Day, National Sangria Day, Sacagawea Day, Games Day, December Solstice, Blue Christmas, Humbug Day, National Coquito Day, Look On The Bright Side Day, National Crossword Puzzle Day, National Homeless Persons’ Remembrance Day, National Maine Day, World Snowboard Day, National Short Girl Appreciation Day, Mathematics Day, National Cookie Exchange Day, Zimbabwe Unity Day, and a very happy Forefathers’ Day,
Since today is the 23rd, I hope the day brings you all joy as you celebrate National Christmas Movie Marathon Day, National Pfeffernusse Day, and National Roots Day.
I know some of you reject the idea of spiritual celebrations or religious holidays, and I know that others have become weary of the pressures and commercialism of the modern holiday season. If you are one of those folks, I offer you my very best wishes that you and your family have a great day and an even better Festivus celebration if that is your thing.
...just be careful what you say during the "airing of grievances" because some things are better left unsaid.
I hope the coming days are peaceful and joyous as we all prepare for National Eggnog Day, Libya Independence Day, Last-Minute Shopper’s Day, National Pumpkin Pie Day, National Boxing Day, National Homeowners Day, Day of Goodwill, National Candy Cane Day, National Whiners Day, Slovenia Independence and Unity Day, National Fruitcake Day, Visit the Zoo Day, Make Cut-Out Snowflakes Day, International Day of Epidemic Preparedness, Holy Innocents Day, National Download Day, National Call A Friend Day, Card Playing Day, Mongolia Independence Day, National Pepper Pot Day, Tick Tock Day, International Cello Day, National Bacon Day, National Resolution Planning Day, Festival of Enormous Changes at the Last Minute, World Peace Meditation Day, National Champagne Day, and the one that causes the most headaches - New Year’s Eve !!!
Now, I know a lot of you are thinking, "seriously, what's the point Box - was all of this really necessary?"
Yes - it's ALL necessary. That's the point. Everyone under the sun seems to have a day. Let's all recognize that day with a little sincerity - it doesn't cost a penny to let someone else say "Merry Christmas" or "Happy Kwanza" while simultaneously keeping our virtue signaling to ourselves for a change. Let's be happy for anyone that wants to celebrate a day and let them call it whatever they want to call it.
If you want to say "happy holidays" because you are worried about not being all-inclusive, good for you.
"Happy Holidays" to you, have a nice day. - just don't try to ruin someone else's day because YOU are sensitive about other people's words.
In fact, if I wrongly assume your holiday by saying 'Merry Christmas' when your ACTUAL December holiday celebration is built around Answer The Telephone Like Buddy The Elf Day...
...well, I’m sorry I ruined your lives and crammed 11 cookies into the VCR.
BUT - if we can all just lay down our SJW hammers for a few minutes and let people enjoy what they want to enjoy instead of forcing our own hangups on others - I wish you a merry Christmas and a happy new year - or Happy Hannuka, or happy Kwanza, or simply enjoy Festivus if that's your thing. Just try to be happy about SOMETHING - for goodness' sake, there's only so much to be happy for these days - let's not screw it up by worrying about how people wish others well and admit that its probably ok - just for a few weeks out of each year, to pretend - it isnt all about us...
or not - I'm saying Merry Christmas - the rest of you can kick rocks
__________________
Opinions stated in this post are solely those of the author, and in no way reflect the opinions or policies of The Department of Defense, The United States Army, The Royal Canadian Mounted Police, The Screen Actors Guild, The Boy Scouts, The Good, The Bad, or The Ugly. These opinions are provided purely as overly sarcastic social commentary and are not meant to be used for mission planning or navigation.
"Make sure your own mask is secure before assisting others"
-Airplane Safety Briefing
Last edited by Box; 12-23-2022 at 10:42.
|
Linear Mode
