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March, the month of the Irish...
Stole these from somewhere...
AN IRISHMAN’S FIRST DRINK WITH HIS SON
While reading an article last night about fathers and sons, memories
came flooding back to the time I took me son out for his first pint.
Off we went to our local pub only two blocks from the cottage.
I got him a Guinness. He didn't like it, so I drank it.
Then I got him a Kilkenny's, he didn't like that either, so I drank
it. Finally, I thought he might like some Harp Lager? He didn't. I drank it.
I thought maybe he'd like whisky better than beer so we tried a
Jameson's; nope!
In desperation, I had him try that rare Redbreast, Ireland's finest whisky.
He wouldn't even smell it. What could I do but drink it!
By the time I realized he just didn't like to drink, I was so
shit-faced I could hardly push his stroller back home!!!
IRISH CONFESSION
I went into the confessional box after many years of being away from
the Catholic Church.
Inside I found a fully equipped bar with Guinness on tap. On one
wall, there was a row of decanters with fine Irish whiskey and
Waterford crystal glasses.
On the other wall was a dazzling array of the finest cigars and chocolates.
Then I heard the priest come in, I said to him, "Father, forgive me, for
it's been a very long time since I've been to confession, but I must
first admit that the confessional box is much more inviting than it
used to be."
He replied, "You moron, you're on my side."
__________________
Out of all the places I've been, this is one of'em....
You haven't lived...until you've almost died...
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