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Based on my experience with the Med Retirement thing(YMMV) - Spouse gets 1/2 of his benefits when he passes if he opted for such - was additional paperwork when set it up on seperation, plus a monthly bill if he was on TDRL. If she remarries, then she loses it and it goes to the kids (if there are any), still at the rate of half to be split evenly between multiple children.
Now...
If said vet had his retirement switched over to VA only payments (mine for a while was half and half - retirement pay being taxable) then it should also transfer to the spouse, and my understanding is it is the same, half of the monthly. I recommend speaking with someone from the VFW, AL, or particularly the DAV, they are all very helpful and can help said spouse work through all the red tape. I went with the DAV.
Additionally, as it was explained to me, if she has her DEERs card, and TriCare for life (as my family got) then they should retain it - again until she gets remarried. Kids will retain it until the same age previously told - I forget but I believe it is like 21 or 25 - maybe as old as 28, been a minute since I went through all the processes setting it up and I seem to recall something changing in the age - and I'm still going through it.
Really though, have them go to the DAV, they can get the specifics and get it done in a timely manner based on their personal situation.
Hope that helped. Feel free to drop me a line if I can asnwer further questions. I'm personally going through all of this now.
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“Though much is taken, much abides; and though
We are not now that strength which in old days
Moved earth and heaven, that which we are, we are;
One equal temper of heroic hearts,
Made weak by time and fate, but strong in will
To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield.”
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