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Divorce
A man in Melbourne calls his son in Brisbane four days before Christmas and says, "I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing. Thirty years of misery is enough." "Dad, what are you talking about?" the son screams. "We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the father says. "We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Perth and tell her." Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone. "Like heck they're getting divorced," she shouts. "I'll take care of this." She calls Melbourne immediately, and screams at her father, "You are NOT getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?" and hangs up. The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay," he says "Its fixed. They're coming for Christmas and paying their own way!"
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