Slaughterhouse 5th St.

PSM · 09-08-2011, 18:02

Quote:

OGDEN -- Charges may ensue for an Ogden man who startled the neighbors by butchering a cow in his driveway over the weekend.

Police were called to the scene at 1:44 p.m. Sunday after the cow's owner began harvesting the animal. A patrolman was responding to a caller who saw a cow being trailered to the home in the 2700 block of Gramercy Avenue.

The caller then reported hearing the cow's audible mooing, followed by what sounded like a gunshot, said Police Lt. Troy Burnett. Then the mooing stopped.

The patrolman's report said when he arrived at the scene a half-block above Monroe Boulevard, "the cow was in the process of losing its head," Burnett said. (

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Link: http://www.standard.net/stories/2011...w-his-driveway

I've seen plenty of deer butchered while hanging from swing sets, but I can't recall a "cow" being "harvested". (Were they even sure it was a cow? Who checked?)

Quote:

"It boggles my mind," Burnett said. "It's not illegal, but it's absurd that people would think slaughtering a cow in their driveway is OK. Maybe on the west side of the county on one of the farms. But in the middle of a high density residential area?"

It's funnier in the city, though.

Quote:

If any children had witnessed the butchering, and become upset, that could possibly constitute disorderly conduct, said Burnett and Mike Junk, Ogden city's senior prosecutor.

Because they see where their burgers come from?

Pat

p.s.: I know that this guy was stupid...but the reaction is still funny.

**PRB** · 09-08-2011, 20:45

I've quartered a few then sent to the butcher to do the fine cutting...same as a deer basically but you need a heavy tractor with a bucket to lift the bugger up. Lots more innards.
Did two one day on a ranch in Canada near MapleCreek.... 30.30 injection each and had just cut the head off and Bob (ranch owner) walked by the hindquarters and got a real swift muscle twitch kick...sent him flying...he got up and said in a normal tone..."By God, I know what the problem is" then walked over and turned the head around..."SOB could still see me!"

PSM · 09-08-2011, 21:14

Quote:

Originally Posted by PRB

but you need a heavy tractor with a bucket to lift the bugger up. Lots more innards.

That's what I was thinking. He probably had it stretched out on the driveway while he was sawing away on the neck. A YouTube vid would be nice.

I wonder how many beers were involved?

(Hmmm. Deer is singular and plural. Beer is singular and beers is plural. Why is that? Richard? Zonie? Dozer?)

Pat

mark46th · 09-08-2011, 22:23

He probably has a couple of cars on blocks in his front yard along with a washing machine...

Longstreet · 09-08-2011, 23:17

Assuming the city the man is from is Ogden, Utah - which is a fairly large city with a population 500,000 plus - my question is where the hell did he get the cow from? And as I think more about it, how did he then get the damn thing to his house? Pretty sure I can scratch off USPS . . .

jaYson

**Razor** · 09-09-2011, 09:26

Quote:

Originally Posted by Longstreet

And as I think more about it, how did he then get the damn thing to his house? Pretty sure I can scratch off USPS . . .

Reading is fundamental:

Quote:

A patrolman was responding to a caller who saw a cow being trailered to the home in the 2700 block of Gramercy Avenue.

Longstreet · 09-09-2011, 14:13

Well don't I feel like a f***en idiot. I guess that would answer at least one of my questions then . . .

**Razor** · 09-11-2011, 00:20

No worries.