A Bad Day

[hydrashok]

There I was sitting at the bar staring at my drink when a large, trouble-making biker steps up next to me, grabs my drink and gulps it down in one swig.

"Well, whatcha' gonna do about it?" he says, menacingly, as I burst into tears.

"Come on, man," the biker says, "I didn't think you'd CRY. I can`t stand to see a man crying."

"This is the worst day of my life," I say. "I'm a complete failure. I was late to a meeting and my boss fired me."
"When I went to the parking lot, I found my car had been stolen and I don't have any insurance.
I left my wallet in the cab I took home.
I found my wife with another man and then my dog bit me."
"So I came to this bar to work up the courage to put an end to it all, I buy a drink,
I drop a capsule in and sit here watching the poison dissolve; then you show up and drink the whole thing!
But, enough about me, how's your day going?"

(True story),...

Once I placed $20.00 into a Jutbox and selected every Johnny Cash song available.

A big biker yells from across the room, "Hey, don't hog the music!" I yell back, "Its Johnny Cash,...you'll get used to it!"

He stands and walks towards me with two friends on either side. I say, "Before you and your buddies kick my ass, I need to tell you a few things. First, I know what being scared is. Second, I've known true fear, and three, I've been beat up by girls toughter than you sorry SOBs".

The big man, puts his hand on my shoulder and says, "So tell me about this John guy."