Family Historical Records

[Penn]

In reply to the possible interest in embellished fictional familial accounts; you can compress the file to forward the mythical charade.....In order to save you both time and discomfort, I offer you the following alterative based in fact:

I had my DNA scanned as part of the world wide genome project conducted by the Anthropology department, my DNA scans as 96% Northern European, 4% African. The entire human genome scans as 4% sub Sahara Black. This would imply that this particular DNA strand has engaged in a continuous incestuous breeding pattern, regionally of course, or at least hoped for, for millions of years.

That said, the region we scan is: Scandinavian/Celtic. The test is a 100% accurate, of the history reported, it is of little interest, as we have been peasants, or recently released tree dwellers for thousands of those unrecorded years, this is readily attestable by the lack of documentation in the historical written record begining 5K years ago, as there has been no mention of a relationship of our thread, to any advancement, or event in human history, such as: the conquering of nations states, curing of diseases, the accumulation of money, or other mundane facts painted on cave walls, or woven into a tribal belt, clan quilt, anywhere at any time on this rock.

Excluding myself of course, it is blatantly obvious at one time there must have been a propensity for the pursuit of dwarfs, considering the mental midgets among you. As stated above, the flaccid history you so blazingly offer is a gene pool that has contributed little of any significance to the species homo, genus sapiens. Again, a fact readily demonstrable with a firm gaze into the nearest mirror, or more courageously viewed with a honest appraisal of your off spring and breeding companion, having the unfortunate experience of observing some of you, it is questionable, whether or not, that your cranium development has in fact reached its modern standard of 1400+ cc capacity.

In this regard, the inflated account maybe relevant by importing meaning into your desperate dull existence, that while you wait, pondering the long line of obscurity you so proudly express your allegiance too, you will find this to confirm a new belief system, also based in myth, that yes! We, or I, or they were here and they were also bipedal. Thus, placating your unconscious compulsion to raise your arms while walking; and at the same time mistakenly decoding the smiles of strangers as kindness, rather than contemptuous amusement.

I’ll pass and thank you for always telling me I was adopted.