For real?

[Penn]

In my business you hear a lot of strange stories, jokes, and advice. Well last evenings encounter with a good looking female client, involved her need to explore the construction of each dishes components on the entire menu. After an exacerbating 3 minutes, I asked to what end is all this information for? She replied that she had medical condition: IBS! I immediately and silently chastised myself for my impatience and informed the women that I would make sure her instructions to the captain, concerning her order, would be carried out to the letter.

Luckily, in my kitchen is a premed student who comes in now and again, exchanging his labor for cooking techniques, as I was determined to makes amends for my rash impatience’s, I began discreetly explaining to the staff what had occurred and how I wanted everything to be perfect for this client, when he just starts laughing hysterically in my open kitchen, ten feet from the table. Laughing, to the point he is bent over, holding on to the counter top! This is so out of character, I am beside myself, thinking WTF??? Meanwhile, as Charlie attempts to speak and with each attempt, falls deeper into uncontrollable laughter , I’m getting embarrassed in the open environment of the kitchen, so I guide him to the cellar steps a few feet away, where in the doorway, holding on, he explains his behavior by outlining the poor women’s condition. Not sure I heard him correctly the first time, I asked Charlie to repeat what he had said. Again he begins losing it, but is able to gasp loud enough: “She’s got swamp ass”!! I think I blinked for a second, shocked at what Charlie said, So, I asked WTF are you saying Charlie? As he slips down the steps laughing and choking on "I" "B "S", “its, Irritable bowel syndrome”, “swamp ass”!!! “She’s got a leaky ass”.

[6.8SPC_DUMP]

IBS = She Be Good

Originally Posted by Penn

In my business you hear a lot of strange stories, jokes, and advice. Well last evenings encounter with a good looking female client, involved her need to explore the construction of each dishes components on the entire menu. After an exacerbating 3 minutes, I asked to what end is all this information for? She replied that she had medical condition: IBS! I immediately and silently chastised myself for my impatience and informed the women that I would make sure her instructions to the captain, concerning her order, would be carried out to the letter.

Luckily, in my kitchen is a premed student who comes in now and again, exchanging his labor for cooking techniques, as I was determined to makes amends for my rash impatience’s, I began discreetly explaining to the staff what had occurred and how I wanted everything to be perfect for this client, when he just starts laughing hysterically in my open kitchen, ten feet from the table. Laughing, to the point he is bent over, holding on to the counter top! This is so out of character, I am beside myself, thinking WTF??? Meanwhile, as Charlie attempts to speak and with each attempt, falls deeper into uncontrollable laughter , I’m getting embarrassed in the open environment of the kitchen, so I guide him to the cellar steps a few feet away, where in the doorway, holding on, he explains his behavior by outlining the poor women’s condition. Not sure I heard him correctly the first time, I asked Charlie to repeat what he had said. Again he begins losing it, but is able to gasp loud enough: “She’s got swamp ass”!! I think I blinked for a second, shocked at what Charlie said, So, I asked WTF are you saying Charlie? As he slips down the steps laughing and choking on "I" "B "S", “its, Irritable bowel syndrome”, “swamp ass”!!! “She’s got a leaky ass”.

and I don't understand why you posted this. The reaction of your "pre-med" frat-boy is juvenile and shallow. Apparently, you handled it properly, right up to the point where you permit him to embarass your dinner guest by laughting out loud in your establishment. Maybe because your female client was "good-looking" you thought this was funny enough to post? I never had this malady, never knew anyone who did, have seen the commercials and I didn't need some frat-boy asshole to tell me what happens when you irritate a bowel, large or small. I'm blinking, shocked that you think that what you posted was remotely amusing, and thinking your dick-wad "employee" should fit in nicely in the Obamacare system. He needs a good bitch-slapping and you do too.

[6.8SPC_DUMP]

Originally Posted by Remington Raidr

and I don't understand why you posted this. The reaction of your "pre-med" frat-boy is juvenile and shallow. Apparently, you handled it properly, right up to the point where you permit him to embarass your dinner guest by laughting out loud in your establishment. Maybe because your female client was "good-looking" you thought this was funny enough to post? I never had this malady, never knew anyone who did, have seen the commercials and I didn't need some frat-boy asshole to tell me what happens when you irritate a bowel, large or small. I'm blinking, shocked that you think that what you posted was remotely amusing, and thinking your dick-wad "employee" should fit in nicely in the Obamacare system. He needs a good bitch-slapping and you do too.

Remi I can relate to your anger. Getting a "brilliant" thought through my head is like a ferret working it's way through gerbil maze.

REAL war is not something I can "imagine" because I haven't lived it.

Certain realities we face as a nation on the home land are not something I would like to imagine - but they are present and I am dealing with them to the best of my ability.

It's nice take my mind off it with humor on the weekend. I wish you wouldn't have brought up anger.

I have read enough of your posts to say with confidence that if you think that you can do to Penn what you said should be done - or tell him how to run his biz: you are things that TR doesn't let me say.

Maybe we could meet up to talk if you are hell bent. ( JJ pull my MOM out of the way ( and be a gentleman) )

For a while I was the "evil" HR guy for more than a couple thousand "casual dining" hourly EEs (no not fast food) and had to handle the legal end of any "disruption" report. It helps to joke for some of us.

I think you owe Penn an apology.

All the best.

Oh and it might be a gag by Penn ....

[Penn]

Remington Radar, I was attempting, prior to your comments, of and on, my determinant effort to insert humor into a rather messy situation, to relate a story.

I am now certain, at least from your post; which exemplifies exceptionally high moral and comedic standards, that I accomplished that, and that you good Sir, might need to arrange an appointment with a proctologist. For it appears, at least to me, that you many need his references. As we know his skill set will not physically address your symptoms, only a well endowed psychologist could meet that necessity; dispatching your anally retentive lack of humor.

[PedOncoDoc]

Originally Posted by Penn

...you good Sir, might need to arrange an appointment with a proctologist...

Naw - he doesn't need a proctologist - with how far his head went up there he can see things clearly for himself.

[Richard]

IBS isn't too funny to those who suffer its consequences - the causes can be many and vary from person to person - your patience with helping the customer discern what she could eat without causing her further public embarrassment from her condition other than making it known to you was exactly as it should be.

Now - IMO - your pre-med student's reaction to IBS is pure age appropriate, juvenile, junior high LEVEL stuff, and the guy needs to get himself together or maybe see somebody about his inability to control his scatalogical infatuation if he's ever going to be an MD. I know a guy in his 50s who has a similar reaction to someone saying the word 'fart' or to the sound of flatulence, and it has caused him some extremely embarrassing moments over the years among adults - sounds as if your pre-meddie has the same issue.

As for the term 'swamp a$$' goes - that's one I haven't heard before and do find amusing - I knew a couple of guys in Group back when who would've been saddled with that for a nickname if we had only thought of it.

Thanks for the new term - maybe I'll get to hang it on somebody one day.

Richard's $.02

[Kyobanim]

I found it extremely funny. I know several with this condition, one of which being my wife. Every one of them jokes and laughs about it all the time. The kid was just being a kid. I can see where somone, who has no knowledge of this, in this situation, would find it funny.

I just ba a calous jerk that needs bitch slapped.

[swatsurgeon]

Rem Raidr...let me put this in perspective for you. Your comments to Penn require an apology, your insinuation towards a med student demand your ignorance reversed with education.
We in the medical field, from the time we enter med school, realize human suffering comes in all shapes, sizes, and types. Unlike your sorry ass statement to Penn, the student found humor in an ailment that can be personally horrific. That is what we do...at the seemingly worst time in a health care related event, we laugh, we joke, we smile...not because we're happy or celebrating the discomfort or hurting of others, but because we use defense mechanisms to cope and find that laughter helps A FUCKING lot. Step into my shoes for a day and tell me too my face that I made a joke inappropriately at a patient's expense.
I recently had a patient that fell ito an acid bath at a work site after being struck by a 500 pound object...funny so far? He came inwith a pulse and quickly lost it. First he's contaminated with a potentially lethal substance. His heart stopped and I asked for 4 volunteers to help me try to save his life....well 12 personnel stayed with me and as we openned his chest and abdomen in the trauma room, (emergency dept) I told a joke...with his heart in my hand and everyone quite anxious about the exposure to the acid, they all broke up in laughter....the patient died but we kept our sanity.
Grow up, learn something and never, ever again criticize what you are ignorant of.
Learn or leave.

ss

[plato]

Originally Posted by swatsurgeon

That is what we do...at the seemingly worst time in a health care related event, we laugh, we joke, we smile...not because we're happy or celebrating the discomfort or hurting of others, but because we use defense mechanisms to cope and find that laughter helps A FUCKING lot.

Or anyone who has ever ridden into a hot LZ.

I don't recall the movie, but I remember the lines, as a small group is getting ready to get on an aircraft. The silence is deafening, and you can almost taste the fear. One of the soldiers who is staying behind, steps up to one about to mount the chopper, and says solemnly "I just want you to know that, if for some reason you don't return....

I want your stereo".

The prim young lady sitting beside me was shocked and dreadfully upset at the many men laughing hysterically in the theater. (me included)

But, you could see in the movie, the reaction of the unit as the fear fell to a level that wasn't crippling.

I bet there wasn't a vet in the theater who didn't remember those (and there's at least one in every unit) who step in and keep life livable.

I thought most of the day how I would respond to the attacks of this thread if they were directed towards me.

I let the emotions settle most of the afternoon, and came to the conclusion, it is good to have friends. Earlier I thought, "man it's getting deep, save the watches".

WD

p.s., Penn, glad you're here, we've got your back.

[Penn]

In this seminar we will review current evidence regarding etiology of major psycho – social symbiotic relationship techniques inducing strong emotional response. We will pay specific attention to current explanatory models that invoke psychological contribution to writing and effects on targeted audiences….



….Class, for the sake of fulfilling a requirement in advanced writing & practicum, to include:

inducing a charged emotional reaction; Mr. XXX story succinctly demonstrates and confirms, conjectures, inferences, exaggeration, satire, comic energy elements, empathy with subject, denial, and good fiction containing humorous aspects of a situation …..

Oh, RR its the comedy thread...


Edit to add: RR where is my yo-yo....

[Team Sergeant]

Remington Raidr is no longer with us. (How's that for bitch-slapping.)

TS

[Richard]

As an aside - IBS is also a Navy term for Inflatable Boat System, a term they used interchangeably for their Combat Rubber Raiding Craft (CRRC) - we used to tell them it meant Itty Bitty Ship.

I'm not sure if they still use the terms today.

Richard

[98G]

Originally Posted by Penn

In this seminar we will review current evidence regarding etiology of major psycho – social symbiotic relationship techniques inducing strong emotional response. We will pay specific attention to current explanatory models that invoke psychological contribution to writing and effects on targeted audiences….



….Class, for the sake of fulfilling a requirement in advanced writing & practicum, to include:

inducing a charged emotional reaction; Mr. XXX story succinctly demonstrates and confirms, conjectures, inferences, exaggeration, satire, comic energy elements, empathy with subject, denial, and good fiction containing humorous aspects of a situation …..

Oh, RR its the comedy thread...


Edit to add: RR where is my yo-yo....

Penn, between you and Team Sergeant I finally had a coffee spilt on keyboard moment. Thank you both for the full laugh-out-loud that was sorely needed this week. I had a pun lined up but do not want to spoil a good ending.