texts from last night.

Remember that text you should not have sent last night? We Do?

http://www.textsfromlastnight.com/

some are hysterical.. here are a few samples. I snickered and giggled my way down the page. Now I remember why I don't have text messaging on my phone..

(212): ??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
Labels: (212)
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(954): the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
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(775): Hello Stephanie, you need to come pick me up at Par Blvrd correctional facility and bring $750-$1000 for bail. I just got a DUI. Thank you.
(1-775): What!?!?! How are you txting?!
(775): Because this is Officer Reynolds, and I just arrested your boyfriend.
Labels: (775)
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(859): im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Labels: (859)
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(248): I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
(1-248): What'd you say?
(248): I told him I was sleep driving
Labels: (248)
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727): im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
(303): lol who won
(727): well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
Labels: (303), (727)

[Kyobanim]

You left out the best one . . .

(859): Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
(502): Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?

[2charlie]

That is awesome. Thanks for sharing. I just about read the whole page. My wife and I had some good laughs.

-2charlie

I was simply amazed that what people text... be careful your drunk texts might make it to this page... hahaha

614): I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?

(703): help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Labels: (703)


617): Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises

(714): OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign

503): PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
(515): Ur type is ready and willing

405): I'm drunk
(615): Is that why you're texting me
(405): Yes

(401): my mouth tastes like poor choices

(805): Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer


303): if i can run in heels then i can drive
Labels: (303)

815) Why is half of me covered in green stuff that won't come off?
(1-815) You stripper-danced on a light pole in the quad. It had fresh paint on it.

281): I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
(936): haha now u have to piss out ur bum

202): Do you have swine flu?
(1-202): I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
(1-202): Pigs, yes. Swine, no.