Broke Back Mountain Lady

Broke Back Mountain Lady



A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife. She was determined to keep the ranch, but knew very little about ranching, so she placed an ad in the

newspaper for a ranch hand.



Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk.



She thought long and hard about it, and when

no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk.

He proved to be a hard worker who put in long

hours every day and knew a lot about ranching.

For weeks the two of them worked hard and

the ranch was doing very well.

Then one day, the rancher's widow said "You have done a really good job, and the ranch

looks great. You should go into town and kick

up your heels."

The hired hand readily agreed and went into

town on Saturday night.

He returned around 2:30 am, and upon entering the room, he found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him.

She quietly called him over to her.

"Unbutton my blouse and take it off," she said. Trembling, he did as she directed.

"Now take off my boots." He did as she asked,

ever so slowly.

"Now take off my socks." He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots.

"Now take off my skirt."

He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the firelight.

"Now take off my bra." Again, with trembling

hands did as he was told and dropped it to the floor.

Then she looked at him and said: "If you ever

wear my clothes into town again, you're fired!"

[Utah Bob]

I would like to point out that the fellers in "Brokeback Mountain" were SHEEPHERDERS, not cowboys.

Hyars a cowboy joke:.

A real dumb ole cowboy named Tex was spotted in town walking down the street with nothing but his hat on.
The Sheriff stopped him, tossed an Indian blanket on him and hauled him off to the hoosegow.
"What's the idea Tex?", the sheriff asked. "Have you gone plumb loco?"
"Well", drawls Tex, "It's along story"
"I'm listening", says the Sheriff.

"Well", says Tex, "I been workin out at the Lazy B fer the past month and everything was goin fine. Then last Wednesday Mr O'Neil the owner heads over to Pueblo to buy a couple of breeding bulls and he leaves me in charge.

Well, this mornin with all the hands out roundin up strays, I'm sittin in the bunkhouse patchin up some saddle leather when Mrs. O'Neil hollers for me to come up to the Ranch House.
I ambled up there and she's sittin in the livin room with only a robe on. She says that her husband told me I was in charge of the hands but that I was supposed to do whatever she said.
I said that I reckoned that was right.
So she drops that dang robe and says that I should take my chaps off.
So I did

Then she says I should take off my shirt, so I did.

Then she tells me to pull off my pants and long johns. I did that too.

Then, she flops down on the couch on her back and she hollers, "Okay, Cowboy. Go to town!"

So I did.