Get a Dog

[BMT (RIP)]

If you
want someone who will eat whatever you put in front of him and never say its not quite as good as his mothers
...then buy a dog.
If you want someone always willing to go out, at any hour, for as long and wherever you want ...
...then buy a dog.
If you want someone who will never touch the remote, doesn't care about football, and can sit next to you as you watch romantic movies
...then buy a dog.
If you want someone who is content to get on your bed just to warm your feet and whom you can push off if he snores
...then buy a dog !
If you want someone who never criticizes what you do, doesn't care if you are pretty or ugly, fat or thin, young or old, who acts as if every word you
say is especially worthy of listening to, and loves you unconditionally, perpetually ..
...then buy a dog.
BUT , on the other hand, if you want someone who will never come when you call, ignores you totally when you come home, leaves hair all over the place,
walks all over you, runs around all night and only comes home to eat and sleep, and acts as if your entire existence is solely to ensure his happiness
.,
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
...then buy a cat!
Now be honest, you thought I was gonna say... marry a man,didn't you?

[Puertoland]

Great stuff. This and the Rules of men are awesome.

[Red Flag 1]

Dog have owners....cats have staff.

Cats allow you to live with them.

RF 1

[Saoirse]

Originally Posted by BMT

If you
want someone who will eat whatever you put in front of him and never say its not quite as good as his mothers
...then buy a dog.
If you want someone always willing to go out, at any hour, for as long and wherever you want ...
...then buy a dog.


BUT , on the other hand, if you want someone who will never come when you call, ignores you totally when you come home, leaves hair all over the place,
walks all over you, runs around all night and only comes home to eat and sleep, and acts as if your entire existence is solely to ensure his happiness
.,
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
...then buy a cat!
Now be honest, you thought I was gonna say... marry a man,didn't you?

BMT, Those first 2 are refuted adamantly by the three dogs in this household! They stick their nose up in the air at their kibble if it is not prepared the way they see fit and go on an old fashioned Celtic IRish hunger strike!!! And going out when it's raining.. HA! They look at me like I have three heads!
As far as that furball cat.....I have never met a cat that is more demanding of attention, food, and will come when you call! LOL She will drool when you pet her!
Opionions be damned at some of those so called animal experts that say that animals don't have personalities.

[Sdiver]

Originally Posted by Red Flag 1

Dog have owners....cats have staff.

Cats allow you to live with them.

RF 1

Here are a few pages taken from the diary of a Dog and a Cat.


Excerpts From a Dog's Diary

Day number 180
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 PM - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 PM - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day number 181
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 PM - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
4:00 PM - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Day number 182
8:00 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
9:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
9:40 am - OH BOY! A WALK! MY FAVORITE!
10:30 am - OH BOY! A CAR RIDE! MY FAVORITE!
11:30 am - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
12:00 noon - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
1:00 PM - OH BOY! THE YARD! MY FAVORITE!
1:30 PM - ooooooo. bath. bummer.
4:00 PM - OH BOY! THE KIDS! MY FAVORITE!
5:00 PM - OH BOY! DOG FOOD! MY FAVORITE!
5:30 PM - OH BOY! MOM! MY FAVORITE!

Excerpts From a Cat's Diary
Day 752 - My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from ruining the occasional piece of furniture. Tomorrow I may eat another house plant.

Day 761 - Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded, must try this at the top of the stairs. In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair...must try this on their bed.

Day 765 - Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body, in attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear into their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was...Hmmm. Not working according to plan.

Day 768 - I am finally aware of how sadistic they are. For no good reason I was chosen for the water torture. This time however it included a burning foamy chemical called "shampoo." What sick minds could invent such a liquid. My only consolation is the piece of thumb still stuck between my teeth.

Day 771 - There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the foul odor of the glass tubes they call "beer". More importantly I overheard that my confinement was due to MY power of "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage.

Day 774 - I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird on the other hand has got to be an informant, and speaks with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his current placement in the metal room his safety is assured.But I can wait, it is only a matter of time.

[Sweetbriar]

Scotty Emerick has the song for you boys. Click here for his page, the song playing is his new song. (If his name doesn't ring a bell, he writes and tours with Toby Keith quite a bit. He sings on the Taliban Song.)