Candidate for Darwin Award

[Hipshot]

They say it takes all kinds...

http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/05/15/wha....ap/index.html

Sure hope this kid doesn't have kids of his own.

[JPH]

“Mosher, 18, told authorities he was trying to empty the .223-caliber rounds to collect the brass casings for scrap.”

“An employee of an Albany scrap metal company told The Post-Star of Glens Falls that the business pays $1.70 a pound for scrap brass shell casings.”

At about $0.30 a round for live ammo around here the boy should have done his homework…

Darwin Award is right

[Sdiver]

*BREATH*.....I can't......stop laughing......long.......enough.....to......type.. ....*BREATH*

[The Reaper]

First, the idiot reporter does not know the difference between bullets and loaded ammunition, rounds, or cartridges.

Second, the kid was probably doing something stupid because he was a jackass. If he had done this with a firearm, it would have been a matter of "the gun accidentally firing" and hitting him.

Finally, I would hope that the frag struck in him the testicles, or the hospital provided him with a vasectomy as part of his treatment. Too stupid to be allowed to reproduce.

Darwin was right.

TR

[shadowwalker]

Yes Darwin works. Hope he does not breed.

[7624U]

Wonder if he was Kin to Toothless out here at mackall

[moobob]

When I was about 8 or 9, some older kids in my neighborhood found some .38 rounds in a ditch. One of them asked me how they could set them off... I said "a gun."

Then he wanted to know if there was any other way. I said "If you're an idiot, you can bang on them with a hammer," not thinking anyone would be dumb enough to do such a thing.

About 45 minutes later, I hear a gunshot... One of them got a hammer, set the round on his back porch, and hit the round with a hammer, with all his stupid friends watching.

Wonder if they people are related?

[Hostile0311]

A friend of mine passed this email on to me earlier this year. I don't know if it has been posted on this board before but there are some stellar performances listed below worth a laugh or two.

The Darwin's - 2006

An annual honour given to the person(s) who did the gene pool the biggest
service by killing themselves in the most extraordinarily stupid way. Last
year's winner was the fellow who was killed by a Coke machine which
toppled over on top of him as he was attempting to tip a free soda out of it.
And the nominees this year, in reverse order, are:

7. A young Canadian man, searching for a way of getting drunk cheaply because he had no money with which to buy alcohol, mixed gasoline with milk. Not surprisingly, this concoction made him ill, and he vomited into the fireplace in his house. The resulting explosion and fire burned his house down, killing both him and his sister.

6. A 34-year-old white male found dead in the basement of his home died of
suffocation, according to police. He was approximately 6' 2" tall and
weighed 225 pounds. He was wearing a pleated skirt, white bra, black and
white saddle shoes, and a woman's wig. It appeared that he was trying to
create a schoolgirl's uniform look. He was also wearing a military gas
mask that had the filter canister removed and a rubber hose attached in its
place. The other end of the hose was connected to one end of a hollow tube
approx. 30" long and 3" in diameter. The tube's other end was, for reasons
unknown, inserted into his rear and was the cause of his suffocation.
Police found the task of explaining the circumstances of his death to his
family very awkward.

5. Three Brazilian men were flying in a light aircraft at low altitude
when another plane approached. It appears that they decided to moon the
occupants of the other plane, but lost control of their own aircraft and
crashed. They were all found dead in the wreckage with their pants around
their ankles.

4. A 22-year-old, man was found dead after he tried to use octopus straps
to bungee jump off a 70 foot railroad trestle. Fairfax County police said
Eric Barcia, a fast-food worker, taped a bunch of these straps together,
wrapped one end around one foot, anchored the other end to the trestle at
Lake Accotink Park, jumped and hit the pavement. Warren Carmichael, a
police spokesman, said investigators think Barcia was alone because his
car was found nearby. "The length of the cord that he assembled was greater
than the distance between the trestle and the ground" Carmichael said.
Police say the apparent cause of death was "Major trauma."

3. A man in Alabama died from rattlesnake bites. It seems that he and a
friend were playing a game of catch, using the rattlesnake as a ball. The
friend, no doubt a future Darwin Awards candidate, was hospitalized.

2. Employees in a medium sized warehouse in west Texas noticed the smell
of a gas leak. Sensibly, management evacuated the building, extinguishing all
potential sources of ignition; lights, power, etc. After the building had
been evacuated, two technicians from the gas company were dispatched. Upon
entering the building , they found they had difficulty navigating in the
dark. To their frustration, none of the lights worked.
Witnesses later described the sight of one of the technicians reaching
into his pocket and retrieving an object that resembled a cigarette lighter.
Upon operation of the lighter-like object, the gas in the warehouse
exploded, sending pieces of it up to three miles away. Nothing was found
of the technicians, but the lighter was virtually untouched by the explosion.
The technician suspected of causing the blast had never been thought of as
'bright' by his peers.

AND THE WINNER.....(ouch....)

1. Based on a bet by the other members of his threesome, Everitt Sanchez
tried to wash his own "balls" in a ball washer at the local golf course.
Proving once again that beer and testosterone are a bad mix, Sanchez
managed to straddle the ball washer and dangle his balls in the machine.
Much to his dismay, one of his buddies upped the ante by spinning the
crank on the machine with Sanchez's balls in place, thus wedging them solidly in the mechanism. Sanchez, who immediately passed his threshold of pain ,
collapsed and tumbled from his perch. Unfortunately for him, the height of
the ball washer was more than a foot higher off the ground than his
testicles were in a normal stance, and his balls were the weakest link.
Sanchez' balls ripped open during the fall, and one testicle was plucked
from him forever and remained in the ball washer , while the other was
compressed and flattened as it was pulled between the housing of the
washer, and the rotating machinery inside. To add insult to injury,
Sanchez broke a new $300.00 driver that he had just purchased from the pro shop, and was using to balance himself. Sanchez was rushed to the hospital for surgery, and the remaining threesome was asked to leave the course.

Note: This last one wouldn't normally count, because the idiot didn't die.
But because he cannot reproduce as a result of his qualifying act of
stupidity, we have allowed it

[LibraryLady]

Hostile0311,

This thread has your identical award nominees listed for 2004. Your email is a bit recycled, I'm afraid.

Here's a link to the actual Darwin awards, "Honoring those who improve the species...by accidentally removing themselves from it!" They are verified for authenticity, according to the Rules.

The site includes the Honorable Mentions, "The stupidity displayed by the participants in the following tales stops short of the ultimate sacrifice, but we salute their spirit and innovation," and Urban Legends, "These apocryphal stories are included as examples of Herculean Darwinian efforts. Be glad, be very glad, these people don't exist."

The part of the site I love the most is titled - Why So Many Men?


LL

[The Reaper]

Originally Posted by Hipshot

They say it takes all kinds...

http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/05/15/wha....ap/index.html

Sure hope this kid doesn't have kids of his own.

Well clearly, there are people who try to do this on a larger scale:

http://darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin2006-04.html

Hammer of Doom
2006 Darwin Award Nominee
Confirmed True by Darwin

(August 2006, Brazil) August brings us a winner from Brazil, who tried to disassemble a Rocket Propelled Grenade (RPG) by driving back and forth over it with a car. This technique was ineffective, so he escalated to pounding the RPG with a sledgehammer. The second try worked--in a sense. The explosion proved fatal to one man, six cars, and the repair shop wherein the efforts took place.

14 more RPG grenades were found in a car parked nearby. Police believe the ammunition was being scavenged to sell as scrap metal. If it wasn't scrap then, it certainly is now!


(2006, Vietnam) In a similar event, a Rolling Stone isn't all that gathers no moss. Three men scavenging for scrap metal found an unexploded 500-pound bomb perched on a hill, and decided to retrieve it with help from Sir Isaac Newton. As they rolled the bomb down the hillside according to the laws of gravity, the bomb detonated, leaving a four-meter crater and sending the three entrepreneurs to a face-to-face meeting with their Maker.

[82ndtrooper]

While with the Duece at Bragg we had a real "Instein" that was a gun bunny that had picked some sort of unexploded ordance off the ther range. You know how they explicitley tell you to watch where you step and to not pick up or handle any unexploded ordanance ? Well he did and then stashed it up in the ceiling tiles of his room in the barracks.

One Saturday we're all watching college football, I believe the Notre Dame Navy game and suddenly the entire building shook like an earthquake !!!! This idiot had gotten up on the chair and was going to show it to his new roomate fresh out of airborne school. It fell to the tile floor and exploded.

His new roomate was on the other side of the locker hiding so he only had hearing impairment but the Idiot ordanance collector did in fact lose one of his testicles. Top told us that hed never be able to produce another idiot and that was a good thing.

After that incident the IG was in ur barracks every week for surprise inspections of the ceiling tiles and our lockers and drawers. Wouldn't ya know it another goon had a "BLOW UP DOLL" in the ceiling on the next inspection. Top hung it on the fire detector for all of us to witness.

I'd never seen Top Small that angry in the 3 years that he was still alive as our First Sergeant.

[Marster]

(North Carolina, 1987) Ivan, an experienced parachutist with 800 jumps under his belt, was videotaping a private lesson given by an instructor for a single trainee. He had attached the video camera to his helmet so that it would capture the entire day of instruction, and the supporting power supply and recorder were in a heavy satchel slung on his back.
The group went up in the plane, and the instructor led the enthusiastic beginner through preparations for the jump. Ivan carefully documented the lesson, which needed to be perfect for the sake of posterity,

When they reached the jump site, Ivan jumped from the back of the plane and filmed the student and instructor jumping from the front of the plane. A few heartbeats later, tape still running, Ivan realized that he had been so focused on filming the jump that he had forgotten to strap on his own parachute. An FAA spokesperson said that the video equipment strapped to his back may have been mistaken for a parachute.

In the footage salvaged from the camera and spliced together, the student and instructor are shown in freefall befire they pull their ripcords and recede rapidly from view. Then the cameraman's hands reach for his own ripcord. When Ivan realizes he has no ripcord, ergo no chute, his hands are seen to flail about wildly, then the camera pans down towards the approaching earth...

Film from the final stage of the plunge was destroyed on impact.


Source: http://darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin1994-12.html

---

If that's not stupid, I don't know what is.

[The Reaper]

Originally Posted by Marster

(North Carolina, 1987) Ivan, an experienced parachutist with 800 jumps under his belt, was videotaping a private lesson given by an instructor for a single trainee. He had attached the video camera to his helmet so that it would capture the entire day of instruction, and the supporting power supply and recorder were in a heavy satchel slung on his back.
The group went up in the plane, and the instructor led the enthusiastic beginner through preparations for the jump. Ivan carefully documented the lesson, which needed to be perfect for the sake of posterity,

When they reached the jump site, Ivan jumped from the back of the plane and filmed the student and instructor jumping from the front of the plane. A few heartbeats later, tape still running, Ivan realized that he had been so focused on filming the jump that he had forgotten to strap on his own parachute. An FAA spokesperson said that the video equipment strapped to his back may have been mistaken for a parachute.

In the footage salvaged from the camera and spliced together, the student and instructor are shown in freefall befire they pull their ripcords and recede rapidly from view. Then the cameraman's hands reach for his own ripcord. When Ivan realizes he has no ripcord, ergo no chute, his hands are seen to flail about wildly, then the camera pans down towards the approaching earth...

Film from the final stage of the plunge was destroyed on impact.


Source: http://darwinawards.com/darwin/darwin1994-12.html

---

If that's not stupid, I don't know what is.

Yep, that was in Franklin County Sport Parachute Center in Louisburg.

On the news for a week. I remember it well.

Marster, are you in the Buchanan DoD School?

TR

[82ndtrooper]

This isn't the first time that's happened.

Where was the "Skygod" in this jump ?

[Hipshot]

Back in late 1970 or early 71, there was a explosion in one of the platoon bays up in the 82nd Airborne's area. The story that went around was one of the young troops found a 4.2" mortar round out on one of the ranges and decided to defuse it back in the platoon bay.

You guessed it - he was using a pipe wrench to unscrew the fuse assembly when it went off. Blew a hole in the side of the barracks. Immediate shake-down within the division resulted in dud grenades, mortar rounds (60mm, 81mm HE and WP (but it's called smoke)), 40mm and all sorts of small arms ammo.