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Old 07-01-2006, 09:32   #1
HOLLiS
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Are you a Democrat or a Republican

Are you a Democrat, Republican or Redneck?

Here is a little test that will help you decide. The answer can be found by posing the following question:

You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes with you, screams obscenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges at you.

You are carrying a Glock cal 40, and you are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before he reaches you and your family. What do you do??
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Democrat's Answer
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question! Does the man look poor? Or oppressed?

Have I ever done anything to him that would inspire him to attack?

Could we run away?

What does my wife think?

What about the kids?

Could I possibly swing the gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?

What does the law say about this situation?

Does the Glock have an appropriate safety built into it?

Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society
and my children?

Is it possible he'd be happy with just killing me?

If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?

Does he definitely want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?

Should I call 9-1-1?

Why is this street so deserted?

We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.

This is all so confusing! I need to discuss it with some friends over a latte and try to come to a consensus.

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Republican's Answer
BANG!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Redneck's Answer
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG!
click....(sounds of reloading)
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click

Daughter: "Nice grouping, Daddy! Were those the Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?"

Son: "Git-r-Dun Pop! Can I shoot the next one?!"

Wife: "You ain't taking that to the taxidermist!"
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Old 07-01-2006, 12:06   #2
Bill Harsey
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LOL!
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Old 07-01-2006, 13:13   #3
Hiclaude
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Hilarious!
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Old 07-01-2006, 13:19   #4
Radar Rider
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Git-R-Dun!
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Old 07-01-2006, 14:46   #5
7624U
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You forgot one...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Quiet Professionals Answer:

BANG! BANG! Shoots Islamic Terrorist in both Knee caps walks over kicks knife away, Puts boot on his neck !

Asks: Ok dick head where is your leader and how many more are you !(in Arabic)
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Old 07-01-2006, 15:52   #6
Radar Rider
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 7624U
You forgot one...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Quiet Professionals Answer:

BANG! BANG! Shoots Islamic Terrorist in both Knee caps walks over kicks knife away, Puts boot on his neck !

Asks: Ok dick head where is your leader and how many more are you !(in Arabic)
Should you not also ask, "Does it hurt?....Good!"?
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Old 07-01-2006, 15:56   #7
7624U
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Naw the wife asks that as shes on the phone with the rest of the wifes
giveing a FRAGO.
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