06-15-2006, 12:03
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#1
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Quiet Professional
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: America, the Beautiful
Posts: 3,193
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Too Hooha?
YOU MAY BE TOO HOOAH IF:
1. Your newborn must attend the newcomers' orientation briefing within the first 30 days.
2. Your wife's two favorite shades of lipstick are light green and loam.
3. You go to a barbecue and insist that your family feed tactically.
4. You make your children clear housing before they go off to college.
5. You require your mechanic to replace the sandbags on your floorboards as part of a tune-up.
6. Your POV is equipped with blackout lights.
7. Your kids call their mother "Household 6".
8. Your kids volunteer to pull air guard on the school bus.
9. Your doorbell sounds off with the current challenge and password.
10. You have sector sketches and range cards posted by every window in your house.
11. You give the command "Fix Bayonets" at Thanksgiving Dinner.
12. Your kids show their meal cards at the kitchen door, except the oldest, who is on separate rations, and must pay for the meal.
13. You make your daughter sign out on pass on Prom Night.
14. Your kindergartner calls recess a "smoke break".
15. Your wife "takes a knee" in the checkout line at the supermarket.
16. You do your "back to school" shopping at the U.S. Cavalry Store.
17. Your kids call the tooth fairy "Slicky Boy".;
18. Your son fails the third grade, but tells everyone he was a "phase three recycle"
19. Your kids salute their grandparents.
20. Your wife's "high-n-tight" is more squared away than your Commander's.
21. Your kids get an LES with their allowance.
22. Your grandmother won "All American Week" and "Best Ranger"
23. Your kids initials are AR, FM, TM, or DA.
24. Your pick-up has your name stenciled on the windshield.
25. Your kids are hand-receipt holders.
26. Your older kids call the youngest one "Cherry" or F-N-G.
27. Your kids recite their ABCs phonetically.
28. Your wife keeps Mermites in the China cabinet.
29. Your wife left you and you held a "Change of Command" ceremony.
30. You call your in-laws the "Slice Elements".
31. Your dog's name is "Ranger".
32. All your possessions are military issue.
33. Your kids call their sandbox "NTC".
34. You have pull-up bars outside the kitchen door.
35. Your daughter's first haircut was a flattop.
36. Your kids pull fireguard.
37. Your newborn's first words were "all OK Jumpmaster".
38. You decorate your Christmas Tree with Chem Lights and Engineer Tape.
39. You've given your children an Article 15.
40. And you are Too Hooah if you understood all of these expressions
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Warrior-Mentor is offline
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06-15-2006, 12:16
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#2
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Quiet Professional
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Greality, CO
Posts: 237
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Hoo-ah
__________________
All men die .....not all men truly live.
Doug 
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Firebeef is offline
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06-15-2006, 12:24
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#3
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Quiet Professional
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: South Georiga
Posts: 797
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I think the only thing you left out was:
You think all problems can be solved with duct tape, a Gerber, or a .45!
__________________
Breaking a law or violation of a regulation is not a mistake. It is willful misconduct.
"If you love wealth more than liberty, the tranquility of servitude better than the animating contest of freedom, depart from us in peace. We ask not your counsel nor your arms. Crouch down and lick the hand that feeds you. May your chains rest lightly upon you and may posterity forget that you were our countrymen." [Samuel Adams]
Jim
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incommin is offline
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06-15-2006, 12:42
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#4
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Quiet Professional
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: In transit somewhere
Posts: 4,044
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How about morning inspection forl the kids - with demerits and a gig pit?
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x SF med is offline
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06-15-2006, 14:09
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#5
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Quiet Professional
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: America, the Beautiful
Posts: 3,193
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YOU REQUIRE THE KIDS TO MAKE SECURITY PATROLS OF THE NEIGHBORHOOD.
You inspect the playground for butts.
You tell the neighbors when their yard fails inspection.
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Warrior-Mentor is offline
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06-15-2006, 20:31
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#6
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Asset
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Missouri
Posts: 6
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Quote:
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29. Your wife left you and you held a "Change of Command" ceremony.
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Thats to funny
How about.....Your kids yell "AT EASE" when you enter the room
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Hangfire is offline
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06-15-2006, 21:47
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#7
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Quiet Professional
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: LA
Posts: 1,653
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Stealing it.
__________________
Somewhere a True Believer is training to kill you. He is training with minimal food or water, in austere conditions, training day and night. The only thing clean on him is his weapon and he made his web gear. He doesn't worry about what workout to do - his ruck weighs what it weighs, his runs end when the enemy stops chasing him. This True Believer is not concerned about 'how hard it is;' he knows either he wins or dies. He doesn't go home at 17:00, he is home.
He knows only The Cause.
Still want to quit?
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NousDefionsDoc is offline
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06-15-2006, 23:27
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#8
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Guerrilla
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: USA- the northeast
Posts: 372
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This is great! 
__________________
Roycroft201
"In a completely rational society, the best of us would aspire to be teachers and the rest of us would have to settle for something less, because passing civilization along from one generation to the next ought to be the highest honor and the highest responsibility anyone could have. " .....Lee Iacocca
I will cede that we frequently have to associate with people we may not respect. - The Reaper
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Roycroft201 is offline
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06-16-2006, 15:55
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#9
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Area Commander
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Cochise Co., AZ
Posts: 6,206
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Quote:
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34. You have pull-up bars outside the kitchen door.
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HOOAH!
Pat
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PSM is offline
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06-17-2006, 05:37
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#10
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Guerrilla
Join Date: Jun 2005
Location: Texas
Posts: 181
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Before lights out you have final formation and say to the kids "fall out and fall in on your beds". At that point they take one step back, growl, execute an about face, and move out smartly to there rooms.
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TFM is offline
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06-17-2006, 12:25
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#11
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Quiet Professional
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: South Georiga
Posts: 797
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Your kids call the bathroom "the latrine".
You assign one of your kids to be a DRO at meal time.
The rocks in your yard are painted yellow or OD green.
__________________
Breaking a law or violation of a regulation is not a mistake. It is willful misconduct.
"If you love wealth more than liberty, the tranquility of servitude better than the animating contest of freedom, depart from us in peace. We ask not your counsel nor your arms. Crouch down and lick the hand that feeds you. May your chains rest lightly upon you and may posterity forget that you were our countrymen." [Samuel Adams]
Jim
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incommin is offline
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06-18-2006, 14:52
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#12
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Guerrilla Chief
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Harrisburg PA
Posts: 864
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Geez, these are great!
I was busted on when my wife and I went to a section party. I told them that she was meeting me at 1815L, and they were like, "You actually tell time that way?" and they tested her when she arrived. She said, "He said to be here at 1815L." They all had a hoot at my expense.
But is there any other way to accurately tell time?!
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Monsoon65 is offline
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