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HOLLYWOOD – Basketball star and Kim Jong-Un BFF Dennis Rodman has been called in by Sony to help negotiate a cessation of hostilities and to ‘normalise’ relations between the media corporation and North Korea, guest contributor Anthony Langlois writes.
With Sony having sustained yet another kick in the berries following threats of terrorist acts by the alleged Hackers that led to cancelling the New York Premier of The Interview, the media giant felt it was time to break out the Nuclear option: get Dennis Rodman involved.
The notorious NBA bad boy and friend to North Korean leader Kim Jong-Un announced via social media that he was once again on his way to visit the so-called dictator, in hopes that a friendly game of Horse between the two could lead to brokering peace and end the recent string of events that left Sony feeling like Heisenberg just knocked on its door.
“I didn’t do dick for Kenneth Bae,” Rodman wrote on his Facebook page, “But I can sure get Spider-man out of a Jam”.
The latter comment quickly sparked on-line speculations that the former B-Ball player was looking to score a part in the studio’s upcoming Sinister Six movie. However The Studio Exec reached out to a Sony insider who commented on the condition of anonymity, or until the next hack leaks it, that last they checked Hell was still pretty Goddamn hot so we’re safe for now.
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