View Full Version : Blonde Joke
BMT (RIP)
04-01-2011, 12:09
There are 3 people on an airplane.
The first person takes a bite of an apple and thinks it is too sweet, so they throw it out of the plane.
The second person takes a bite of a lemon and thinks it is too sour, so they throw it out of the plane.
The third person takes a bite out of a grenade and thinks it is too hard, so they throw it out of the plane.
When the plane lands, the 3 people decide to take a walk.
They come across a little girl that is really crying.
“Little Girl, Little Girl, why are you crying?”
“Because an apple fell out of the sky and killed my baby kitten.”
They walk further and come across a little boy that is really crying.
“Little Boy, Little Boy, why are you crying?”
“Because a lemon fell out of the sky and killed my baby puppy.”
They walk further and come across a blonde woman sitting along the curb laughing her rear off.
“Why are you laughing?”
“Because I just farted and the building behind me blew up.”
BMT
longrange1947
04-01-2011, 12:37
Nope, try again. :munchin :D
greenberetTFS
04-01-2011, 15:19
Well that was really funny BMT,good one..........;)
Big Teddy :munchin
Here ya go LR ......
A blonde came running up to her husband in the driveway as he came home from work just jumping for joy. He didn't know why she was jumping for joy but thought, what the heck, and started jumping up and down with her.
She said, "Honey, I have some really great news for you!"
He said, "Great, tell me what you're so happy about!"
She stopped jumping and was breathing heavily from all the jumping up and down, when she told him that she was pregnant!
He kissed her and told her, "That's great! I couldn't be happier!"
Then, she said, "Oh, honey, there's more!"
He asked, "What do you mean, 'more?'"
She said, "Well, we are not having just one baby, we are going to have TWINS!"
Amazed at how she could know so soon after getting pregnant, he asked her how she knew.
She said, "Well, that was the easy part. I went to Wal-Mart and bought the TWIN PACK home pregnancy test kit and BOTH tests came out positive!!"
:munchin
She said, "Well, we are not having just one baby, we are going to have TWINS!"
Amazed at how she could know so soon after getting pregnant, he asked her how she knew.
She said, "Well, that was the easy part. I went to Wal-Mart and bought the TWIN PACK home pregnancy test kit and BOTH tests came out positive!!"
:munchin
:D :D :D
Here ya go LR ......
A blonde came running up to her husband in the driveway as he came home from work just jumping for joy. He didn't know why she was jumping for joy but thought, what the heck, and started jumping up and down with her.
She said, "Honey, I have some really great news for you!"
He said, "Great, tell me what you're so happy about!"
She stopped jumping and was breathing heavily from all the jumping up and down, when she told him that she was pregnant!
He kissed her and told her, "That's great! I couldn't be happier!"
Then, she said, "Oh, honey, there's more!"
He asked, "What do you mean, 'more?'"
She said, "Well, we are not having just one baby, we are going to have TWINS!"
Amazed at how she could know so soon after getting pregnant, he asked her how she knew.
She said, "Well, that was the easy part. I went to Wal-Mart and bought the TWIN PACK home pregnancy test kit and BOTH tests came out positive!!"
Those poor twins...hope they are not blonde as well! :D Oh the stories blonde twins can tell.....;)
Okay, okay....where are all the red-head jokes??? Let's not leave them out! hahahaha:lifter
Holly
We have quite a few blondes here in Taxas...but they're a bit of a different breed...
A blonde city girl from Dallas named Caitlin marries a Lubbock rancher. One morning, on his way out to check on the cows, the rancher says to his new wife, “The insemination man is coming over to impregnate one of our cows today, so I drove a nail into the 2x4 just above where the cow’s stall is in the barn. Please show him where the cow is when he gets here, okay?”
The rancher leaves for the fields. After a while, the artificial insemination man arrives and knocks on the front door, so Caitlin takes him down to the barn. They walk along the row of cows, and when she sees the nail, tells him, “This is the one right here.”
The man, assuming he is dealing with an airhead blonde, asks, “Tell me lady, 'cause I’m dying to know...how would YOU know that this is the right cow to be bred?”
“That’s simple," she replies. "By the nail that’s over its stall.”
Laughing rudely at her, the man says, “And what, pray tell, is the nail for?”
Caitlin turns to walk away and says sweetly over her shoulder, “I guess it’s to hang your pants on.”
Richard :munchin
longrange1947
04-03-2011, 09:29
Now you have them!!! :D
We have quite a few blondes here in Taxas...but they're a bit of a different breed...
Caitlin turns to walk away and says sweetly over her shoulder, “I guess it’s to hang your pants on.”[/I]
Richard :munchin
Would have said the same thing to the jackass!!!:cool: hehehee
Holly--->Proud to be a blonde!