Men strike back! ! ! ! ! ! !

[NousDefionsDoc]

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. It should be opened when she brings it.
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Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.
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Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
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How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me."
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How do you fix a woman's watch?
You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
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Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to
build up the required pressure.
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If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?
The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
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What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told.
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I married a Miss Right.
I just didn't know her first name was Always.
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Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes
a woman's sex drive by 90%.
It's called a Wedding Cake.
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Why do men die before their wives?
They want to.
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Women will never be equal to men until they can
walk down the street with a bald head and a beer
gut, and still think they are sexy.
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In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.
Then God created Man and rested.
Then God created Woman.
Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.
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[Ambush Master]

How many men does it take to clean a Toilet ???

NONE !!! That's Women's Work !!!

[Roguish Lawyer]

LMAO

[Team Sergeant]

Originally posted by Roguish Lawyer
LMAO

He's laughing only because Catwoman is in the other room.....

[ghuinness]

Why horses are better than men :

1. If they don't work out you can sell them.
2. They don't come with in-laws.
3. You don't have to worry about your children looking like them.
4. You never have to iron their saddle pads.
5. If you get too fat for one you can shop for a bigger one.
6. They smell good when they sweat.
7. You can repair their "clothes" with duct tape.
8. It's possible to keep them from "jumping the fence".
9. You can force them to stay in good physical condition...with a whip if necessary.
10. They don't want their turn at the computer.
11. They turn white with age, but not bald.
12. They've never *heard* of PMS.
13. They learn to accept restraint.
14. They love to go trail riding.
15. They don't care what you look like, as long as you have a carrot.
16. If your horse starts to stray, you can just throw a rope around his neck.
17. You can see to it that your horse is well groomed.
18. Once you break a horse, he'll always be obedient.
19. A horse can understand why you'd want to buy your shoes in sets of four.
20. Horses are into "stable" relationships.
21. You can have horses gelded and they hardly seem to notice.
22. A horse would rather munch his wild oats than sow them.
23. You can lead a horse to water, but a man will insist on driving and get you hopelessly lost.
24. Amy man would have to admit that, next to a horse, he feels somehow---inadequate.
25. There are plenty of good horses to go around!


:D

[NousDefionsDoc]

ghuinness,
I didn't like that one so much.

:D :D

[Kyobanim]

That's some funny stuff.

now to send it on to everyone I know, annonymously. :cool:

I married a Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.
You must have met my wife.

[Gypsy]

Originally posted by NousDefionsDoc
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Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to
build up the required pressure.
-------------------------------------------------------------------


LOL!