View Full Version : Things I Learned From Movies
* All cars blow up in a big fireball when they wreck.
* You should ALWAYS hold a pistol sideways in your hand.
* If you are diving or doing somersaults, you can't be shot.
* Good guys always get wounded in the left shoulder or the leg.
* Whores have hearts of gold.
* A six-shot revolver can fire nine times without reloading.
* Every Vietnam veteran has a footlocker stored somewhere with grenades, dynamite and some kind of exotic high-powered rifle in there.
* Large, loft-style apartments in New York City are well within the price range of most people--whether they are employed or not.
* At least one of a pair of identical twins is born evil.
* Should you decide to defuse a bomb, don't worry which wire to cut. You will always choose the right one.
* Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communications system of any invading alien society.
* It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts: your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessors.
* If you are blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22.
* Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their arch enemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gasses, lasers, and man-eating sharks, which will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.
* All beds have special L-shaped cover sheets that reach the armpit level on a woman but only to waist level on the man lying beside her.
* All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.
* It's easy for anyone to land a plane providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.
* Once applied, lipstick will never rub off -- even while scuba diving.
* You're very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.
* Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German or Russian officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German or Russian accent will do.
* The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window in Paris.
* A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating, but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.
* If a large pane of glass is visible, someone will be thrown through it before long.
* If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises in their most revealing underwear.
* Word processors never display a cursor on screen but will always say: Enter Password Now.
* Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorously from left to right every few moments.
* All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off and beep loudly if they are hidden.
* A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
* Police departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.
* When they are alone, all foreign military officers prefer to speak to each other in English.
And a few of my own:
* You can get ANYWHERE in NYC in 10 minutes or less.
* There is ALWAYS a parking space in front of the building/business you're going to, no matter how much traffic there is.
* There are NO ugly Vampire chicks.
* Commandos eat Green Berets for breakfast.
* Every surplus store has a special/secret room in the back that has rocket launchers, radio controlled claymore mines, and crew served weapons that can be carried by a 110 lb women.
* You can blow up a speeding car with a single 9mm round.
* All snipers can make a head shot at a moving target, from '100 feet away or greater, with only one round.
Dominus_Potior
09-25-2007, 07:49
LOL. Man, I live by these rules everyday. Great post.
Thanks those were great. Now I am GTG for any situtation that may come my way.
In the 50's, most cowboy six shooters were belt fed. That was a big joke back then that they had seemingly infinite rounds. No one ever reloaded. Later the movie industry started adding reloading to the scenes.
The Reaper
09-25-2007, 09:16
Watch how often pistols go to slide lock in a sequence as well.
If a scene calls for an actor to fire a round or two before moving or cutting to a different camera, that is the number of blanks they are issued. Always back in action when the sequence cuts back to them. They must be the fastest malfunction drillers in the world to do that. I have seen guns shot to slide lock four or five times per mag before the script actually calls for them to run dry.
Don't forget that the opponent will always stand still for whatever the good guy is doing, regardless of whether it is a haymaker or a high spinning roundhouse kick. They are just stupid like that.
Oh yeah, and a guy in a Corvette or on a sportbike cannot outrun a Crown Vic with a light bar on top. The chase will go on for miles with the bike or muscle car cutting sharp corners while the land yacht wallows and slides around them. They must reduce speed to the posted limts on the straight sections or the Crown Vics all have Roush engines with 500+ hp.
No matter how many people the good guy shoots, he leaves the scene (usually with the girl), no Miranda, no statement, no questions, no "be at the station to make a statement at 0700 tomorrow". The typical Bruce Willis "Diehard" movie would take the rest of his career to fill out the paperwork and be boarded for, much less be returned to duty with a weapon for the next episode. And where is his ammo bearer? He normally uses at least ten to twenty mags, and carries just three, max. Must be loose rounds from his pockets.
Finally, any Rube Goldberg device McGyver or Bond builds is bound by physical laws to work, no matter how improbable.
TR
Doczilla
09-25-2007, 12:46
Gunshot wounds to the shoulder, though traversing lungs, huge blood vessels, and nerves to the arm, don't ever cause fatal hemorrhage or tension pneumothorax or permanent nerve damage.
The proper response to a "flatline" is to shock it.
More than 15 seconds of CPR is futile. The one exception is if you scream at the patient "live, damn you, live!" Slapping is usually helpful.
The proper treatment for any patient who is not breathing from any cause is to perform a cricothyroidotomy with a pen.
Nobody on a stakeout for hours ever has to go to the bathroom.
Highly trained, heavily armed, armored SWAT teams are always led at the front by a detective who is wearing a concealable vest and carrying a six shot revolver.
All critically ill people in comas have machines that beep, whirr, and click, though none of them is actually intubated and on a ventilator.
Warning alarms on medical equipment always signal impending death.
There is always enough ammo.
Though guns are in >50% of households in this country, there is invariably none in any house that is broken into while the family is home. There is, however, always a baseball bat or golf club.
All victims must immediately be yanked from car wrecks by well-meaning bystanders or police, who can never wait for rescue tools or c-spine immobilization. This unfortunately translates to real life as well.
Powerful handgun blasts will send the victim sailing through the air on impact.
Gunshot wound to the chest causes death within seconds, only long enough for the victim to realize that he's dead.
Gunshot wounds to the brain will allow for several seconds of incredulous realization before death.
ER doctors wear ties.
Nobody dies in agony, except the aforementioned rookie who made the mistake of showing a picture of his sweetheart.
The finger belongs inside the trigger guard at all times.
SWAT teams carry blowtorches for cutting through locks on big plate glass doors that they could have just smashed.
Any cop who is visitiing on vacation is by default smarter and more competent than that city's indiginous police force.
No police officer has ever heard of the "low ready" position.
Soldiers who are hunting down fugitive green berets or musicians from Chicago have M-16s but not a single other piece of equipment or ammunition on their body.
Everyone knows how to weld.
Spaceships have advanced technology that can detect other ships from thousands of miles away, but don't have any guided munitions capable of hitting said target until they are close enough to be stabbed with a knife.
'zilla
timeshadow (RIP)
09-25-2007, 15:53
I like this thread! OK, here are some more:
Police department computers can instantly access a DOD database containing detailed information on every former serviceman. It even lists the names of every member of every infantry squad and ODA that you have ever served on; along with your complete 201-File, Medical Records, NCOER's, hand receipts, Jump Log, and PT Card. Likewise, every CQ Loq and Staff Duty Journal ever written in any branch of the armed forces can be accessed on-line from any computer.
Detectives usually pull all-night stakeouts while dressed in suits and ties, and parked directly under a street lamp outside the target in the most dangerous neighborhood in town. One of the officers leaves the location on foot every hour to get more coffee. The hordes of pimps, drug dealers and other hustlers walking by pay no attention to the two white dudes sitting in the car with binoculars and radio handsets.
Plainclothes officers are permitted to carry distilled spirits in steel hip flasks on their persons while on duty, and to stir it into their coffee while in full public view.
Armed criminal gangs are very ethnically diverse, and always have at least one member of every human racial group, and with whom they all enjoy friendly relations.
Narcotics detectives often stick their moistened finger-tips into large bags of unidentified white powder, and then taste it with their tongue without suffering any ill effects. Likewise, any undercover narc is authorized to possess and consume large amounts of hard I.V. drugs at any time in order to maintain "street cred". and is free to replenish his personal stash from material in the Evidence Room.
Lone detectives without backup or communications and carrying a briefcase full of cash are sent off to conduct linkups with kidnappers in an unknown location.
Anyone using a set of lock picks can pick any lock within seconds, without ever practicing, and without ever failing to gain immediate access.
Complex security alarm systems can be neutralized by snipping one wire located in an unlocked control panel outside the building.
All ex-military guys served in SF, Rangers, SMU's, Force Recon, S.E.A.L.S., etc.; and never in any ordinary unit . They also personally know every other guy who has ever served on any of these units, and are proficient in every skill set found in the armed forces.
The user of every government hand-held radio can instantly communicate in the clear with anyone on every other existing official network or frequency.
All cities have huge abandoned factories filled with functional machinery and still furnished with electric power and steam. These facilities are unguarded and easily accessed through a large hole in a chain link fence, and all mechanical systems can be activated by large toggle switches located on every wall.
Lengthy firefights featuring machine pistols, rockets and grenades and involving dozens of combatants attract no attention until just after they conclude, at which time every emergency vehicle in the city arrives at the exact same time from all directions in densely packed formations. Upon arrival, they fail to properly identify or question the unknown armed civilians still milling around the scene.
Police officers under suspension from duty frequently launch unsanctioned solitary armed infiltrations into the homes of senior organized crime figures, and are then later reinstated to the force with no legal or professional consequences to themselves.
Within hours of being admitted to a trauma center with multiple gunshot wounds, patients are lying comfortably in a private hospital room and conversing with visitors. Likewise, anyone can access any part of any hospital at any time without being challenged simply by donning a white smock.
Low-level employees of federal security agencies routinely plan and conduct unsanctioned assassinations of U.S. citizens on American soil, to include members of their own organizations. These personnel also conduct lengthy solo operations throughout the world on their own initiative without having to report to or coordinate with anyone else.
Anyone with any level of pilot training can fly and land any aircraft without any prior familiarization, and with no more than a cursory scan of the control panel.
Anyone sporting blue coveralls and a toolbox can enter any part of any airport at any time.
Veteran detectives with one week left until retirement are usually sent out against their will on a final dangerous mission with an unstable rookie partner who they intensely dislike.
----------------
- Marty
Reminds me of a conversation I had with a recruiter for a LE agency down here. He was prepping me for an oral review board and said to me, "just don't be like the last guy I sent, when asked why he wanted to be a cop, he said, 'well, I watched a lot of COPS (the show) when I was younger and looks pretty easy". :D
TR- How about when the slide locks back and the actor continues to fire... and the sound effects continue? :rolleyes:
Things I Learned From Movies:
John Wayne was Hot in "The Green Berets" :lifter
and SF Men are...Hot! ;)
Holly
I learned George Clooney will not take a part in a movie as a Soldier unless he gets to wear at least two tabs and every skill badge made. The President's Hundred tab is not in his contract. :D
And no one just gets wounded, at least seriously wounded. It is acceptable for a lead character to receive a light wound which they can shrug off with the words "I'm alright", though obviously in intense pain.
In the movies, hardly anyone ever farts.
Jack Bauer can hold a piss for 24 hours.
If the end of the world is coming, only 3 people will know and they are, coincidentally, the only people on earth equiped with the knowledge to stop it.
''In the movies, hardly anyone ever farts''.
I think thats because of the movie Blazing Saddles they pretty much took care of that for the next couple of hundred years. :D
''Can we have some more beans Mr Taghart.''
Let's not forget that all assasins/commandos/cops that are "good" can shoot the gun out of a person's hand, where as the "bad" assasins/commandos can't hit anything with their fully automatic weapons.
82ndtrooper
09-26-2007, 09:19
Steven Seagal:
He's served with Army SF, Army Ranger, Delta Force, Navy SEALs, EOD, CIA, NSA, FBI, DEA, OSHA, Marine Force Recon, Federal Marshals and every single city PD in the Northeast U.S. Yet through all this training he still runs like a little girl.
He is Combat dive qaulified, military freefall quailifed, Advanced urban combat, Advanced recon and target exploitation qaulified, a P100 shooter, IDPA 10 time National champ, attended OTC, went to Panama with SEAL Teams and struck his superior officer and was then made a cook with knife throwing skills, EOD skills, dive skills, weapons expert, naval gunfire expert, submariner, flight deck boss, Air boss, and even flies a helo pretty well.
He's been undercover in a prison and shot the prettiest woman that invaded said prison and made friends with all the felons, murderers, and rapists. Prisons have an arsenal of military hardware and every inmate knows how to use each small arms and crew served weapons yet he only used the 1911 .45 ACP to take out large steel objects that fall on his opponents.
Geeeez, I could continue but I won't.
Oh yeah, he's the only cop that I've seen actually wear a Black Beret with the Ranger Regiment Flash with a "De Oppresso Liber" Crest.
Team Sergeant
09-26-2007, 09:46
* * If you are blonde and pretty, it is possible to become a world expert on nuclear fission at the age of 22.
Get your facts straight! :D
The movie the above quote refers to is "The Saint".
Val Kilmer plays "Simon Templar" and is out to steal the COLD FUSION formula invented by female scientist Dr. Emma Russell, played by Elisabeth Shue.
That's pretty blonde & "cold fusion" expert.:D
Am I the only one that reads "Scientific American". :rolleyes:
Team Sergeant
(Understands the difference between nuclear fission and cold fusion. TS also knows what nuclear process the sun uses to generate energy......;))
And then there's Christmas Jones...
The world's foremost nuclear physicist. :rolleyes:
Rumblyguts
09-26-2007, 10:16
Let's not forget that all assasins/commandos/cops that are "good" can shoot the gun out of a person's hand, where as the "bad" assasins/commandos can't hit anything with their fully automatic weapons.
Well, then there's The A-Team where neither side could really hit anything.
They also taught me that 100's of ricochets will spark at the bad-guys' feet, yet not one round will ricochet into the target.
Of course, it was The A-team, maybe they were just that good :p
rubberneck
09-26-2007, 10:22
Well, then there's The A-Team where neither side could really hit anything.
They also taught me that 100's of ricochets will spark at the bad-guys' feet, yet not one round will ricochet into the target.
Of course, it was The A-team, maybe they were just that good :p
I pity the fool that mocks the A-team.:lifter
Team Sergeant
09-26-2007, 10:25
And then there's Christmas Jones...
The world's foremost nuclear physicist. :rolleyes:
Denise Lee Richards
Born February 17, 1971 (1971-02-17) (age 36) at the time of the movie and (if memory serves) she's a brunette.
Elisabeth Shue, early thirties at time of movie, Majored in Government at Wellesley College; transferred to Harvard University, blonde and actually intelligent!
Denise Richards married charlie sheen..... not too smart. :rolleyes:
TS
Michelle
09-26-2007, 10:36
Cell phones never have outages, dropped calls or tower issues. Even in Siberia, all 5 bars are present without interruption and the urgent calls always get through. Clearly they are not with Verizon.
Every powerful computer in the world is DOS based. Microsoft does not exist
A laptop battery can last for days at a time without being recharged
Systems never crash or freeze up. This could be due to the no Microsoft issue mentioned above.
You can hack a password (DOS again mind you) in 5 tries or less
Similarly, you can decrypt ANYTHING in 5 minutes
Wireless connection is available everywhere, including the sewers of New York, ancient burial tombs in Egypt, nuclear reactor cores, and the vaults of Fort Knox. This is helpful for using the laptop with the endless battery.
Sensitive software programs and harddrives will self destruct if tampered with
No one ever backs up anything important.
m1
blonde and actually intelligent! TS
Sir,
Heyyyyyyy..... :o :p
Okay, back to topic...
Holly
(Still blonde, but trying to act smarter...
and being jealous of Michelle's red-hair!) :D
Cold Steel
09-26-2007, 11:43
Don’t forget tires will always screech to a halt even on gravel or dirt roads, bullets will either land at your feet kicking up a four foot cloud of dust or they will manage to hit the walkway railing (in a straight line)you are running parallel to, and when there is no way to get from the top of a 10 story building you can always jump into the Chinese restaurant’s dumpster (which lid is always open) below and walk away with noodles on your shoulder. :cool:
Wireless connection is available everywhere, including the sewers of New York, ancient burial tombs in Egypt, nuclear reactor cores, and the vaults of Fort Knox. This is helpful for using the laptop with the endless battery.
That's only because of the WI-FI connection from Panera Bread Company down the street. :D
A kitchen table, flipped on its side, provides unbreachable cover against all weapons except the infamous slow-motion RPG, which takes 10 seconds to cross the room
You can outrun a 10,000 foot-per-second explosion
Bottles in western saloons can be shot and shatttered without affecting the mirror behind them
"Narcotics detectives often stick their moistened finger-tips into large bags of unidentified white powder, and then taste it with their tongue without suffering any ill effects."
When I was in high school, I knew a Mom who did that with an ounce bag of PCP. She spent three days in a psychiatric hospital and wasn't right for a month (well, kinda hard to tell -- she wasn't real stable to start).
TS also knows what nuclear process the sun uses to generate energy......;))
"What is nuclear fusion? I'll take Star Development for $300 Alex.''
Team Sergeant
(Understands the difference between nuclear fission and cold fusion. TS also knows what nuclear process the sun uses to generate energy......;))
So I guess it's safe to assume then, that YOU'RE NOT a Blonde? :D ;)
Well, then there's The A-Team where neither side could really hit anything.
They also taught me that 100's of ricochets will spark at the bad-guys' feet, yet not one round will ricochet into the target.
Of course, it was The A-team, maybe they were just that good :p
....and let's not forget, that every time that the "bad" guys came at them in their vehicles, and Hannibal and the boys would shoot at them with their weapons, or their home made launchers, whether it be compressed gas cylinders or potato guns, the bad guys cars would flip end over end over end over end, and the bad guys would get out and walk around with nary a scratch on them....just a strained neck that they would be massaging while they were walking around in a dazed stupor.
bravo22b
09-27-2007, 15:33
Here's something I learned at the movies:
Even though the hero is a former member of an unnamed elite counter-terrorism unit, and has all the skills previously mentioned (such as the ability to out shoot the guy armed with a scoped high power rifle when the hero only has a pistol), he has no training in EPW search or how to secure an objective. In fact, once the bad guy has been shot, the SOP for securing an objective appears to be milling around discussing how you foiled their plans. It is not necessary to disarm the wounded enemy, search for more enemy combatants, or even maintain a secure perimeter. It's Miller time!
But wait... the bad guy, only wounded, manages to reach his weapon which has been conveniently left within arms reach, mutters an epithet at the hero, and shoots (but only wounds) the hero or some other main character, then dying in a hail of gunfire. Now it Miller time...:rolleyes:
bricklayer
01-15-2008, 13:52
In WW2 there where hippies!
Tankers fire pretty paint to conserve on ammo and blast loud music going into battle.
They also add extensions on the main gun to scare the enemy!
What movie was this?
The Reaper
01-15-2008, 14:00
In WW2 there where hippies!
Tankers fire pretty paint to conserve on ammo and blast loud music going into battle.
They also add extensions on the main gun to scare the enemy!
What movie was this?
Kelly's Heroes, baby.
TR
Ret10Echo
01-15-2008, 14:07
Kelly's Heroes, baby.
TR
Oddball: "Hi man"
Big Joe: "What you doin?"
Oddball: "Drinking wine and Eating cheese and catching some rays you know"
Big Joe: "What's happened?"
Oddball: "Well the tank's broken and they're trying to fix"
Big Joe: "Then Why the Hell aren't you up there helping them?!"
Oddball: "I only ride 'em I don't what make's 'em work"
bricklayer
01-15-2008, 14:44
woof, woof!
I grew up watching this movie with my father as a kid. One of the best movies I have seen to date. And you gotta love the song by Mike Curb Congregation, Burning Bridges.
The antihero
01-16-2008, 19:28
If aliens, zombies, vampires or the like have just invaded the world and you are the only one left alive then you are a retired SOF soldier or intelligence operative (sometimes both).
You can slit a human throat open by slightly touching it with a blade.
People infected by any pandemic deadly virus are terribly ugly to look at, can scream, grunt and moan but not speak, they want to kill you and can run like hell (not to mention jump).
Monsoon65
01-18-2008, 23:41
- When a plane is going to crash, the pilot always struggles with the controls saying, "I can't hold her any longer" or "I'm losing it!"
- One bullet kills 20 Indians.
- No matter how many times the hero is punched or kicked in the jaw, it never breaks and he never loses any teeth.
- The hero can start with an armory full of weapons, but the last fight is always with knives or knuckles.
- If you run out of ammo for your weapon, just drop it where you're at.
Goggles Pizano
01-19-2008, 11:11
Steven Seagal:
He's served with Army SF, Army Ranger, Delta Force, Navy SEALs, EOD, CIA, NSA, FBI, DEA, OSHA, Marine Force Recon, Federal Marshals and every single city PD in the Northeast U.S. Yet through all this training he still runs like a little girl.
He is Combat dive qaulified, military freefall quailifed, Advanced urban combat, Advanced recon and target exploitation qaulified, a P100 shooter, IDPA 10 time National champ, attended OTC, went to Panama with SEAL Teams and struck his superior officer and was then made a cook with knife throwing skills, EOD skills, dive skills, weapons expert, naval gunfire expert, submariner, flight deck boss, Air boss, and even flies a helo pretty well.
He's been undercover in a prison and shot the prettiest woman that invaded said prison and made friends with all the felons, murderers, and rapists. Prisons have an arsenal of military hardware and every inmate knows how to use each small arms and crew served weapons yet he only used the 1911 .45 ACP to take out large steel objects that fall on his opponents.
Geeeez, I could continue but I won't.
Oh yeah, he's the only cop that I've seen actually wear a Black Beret with the Ranger Regiment Flash with a "De Oppresso Liber" Crest.
You forgot his notorious weapons check by using his forefinger to push back the slide of said .45 then, of course, not return the weapon to battery.:D
RCFerguson
01-21-2008, 11:16
Just like the A-Team...
Never carry extra magazines for your assault rifles, always shoot from the hip, and when you run out of ammo (at the exact same time as your buddies), just throw down your weapons and surrender to the guys who, only moments before, were desperately trying to kill you.
The bad guys, now that you are disarmed, no longer wish to shoot you, but rather try and talk you to death.
Bombs and mortars NEVER explode in foxholes or shell craters.
Everyone can hold their breath while swimming a half mile underwater.
LeapingGnome
01-21-2008, 12:02
My personal favorite in the "drop the weapon when it is out of ammo" category is...
It seems like no one thinks to pick up the bad guy's weapon.. if it's not 5.56 it won't work...
When Jack Bauer racks a shotgun, terrorists three blocks away can hear it.
People infected by any pandemic deadly virus are terribly ugly to look at, can scream, grunt and moan but not speak, they want to kill you and can run like hell (not to mention jump).
If I’m thinking of the same movie, then I definitely learned of a flaw in my popcorn-eating technique. What happens is, when reaching for more popcorn during certain scenes (such as when our hero enters the hive in search of his faithful companion) my arm can inadvertently cover my eyes for whole minutes at a time.
If I’m thinking of the same movie, then I definitely learned of a flaw in my popcorn-eating technique. What happens is, when reaching for more popcorn during certain scenes (such as when our hero enters the hive in search of his faithful companion) my arm can inadvertently cover my eyes for whole minutes at a time.
LOL, that was a great movie, no?
I learned, when I was younger, that a hat helps ;)
My only problem with I Am Legend was the fact that this guy could have an arsenal of weapons, yet he only carries his M4, he leaves his pistol or any other weapon at his car....
Yes, great movie. I will have to get the DVD to see what I missed!
My only problem with I Am Legend was the fact that this guy could have an arsenal of weapons, yet he only carries his M4, he leaves his pistol or any other weapon at his car....
LOL, I guess he had to save room in his murse for canned goods.
The antihero
01-22-2008, 07:53
LOL, that was a great movie, no?
My only problem with I Am Legend was the fact that this guy could have an arsenal of weapons, yet he only carries his M4, he leaves his pistol or any other weapon at his car....
I suppose you haven't seen 28 Days Later (a similar British movie that I was also thinking about) where even after a catastrophe with millions of dead and aggressive infected roaming all over UK still ONLY soldiers have guns. Civilian survivors walk about London armed only with machetes and baseball bats (well, the occasional molotov cocktail). Effect of gun control I suppose. Find some guns dummies!
Mind you, in the sequel (28 Weeks Later) the U.S. Army arrives with tanks, Apache helicopters, .50s in sandbagged positions and snipers with M21s on rooftops.
I suppose you haven't seen 28 Days Later (a similar British movie that I was also thinking about) where even after a catastrophe with millions of dead and aggressive infected roaming all over UK still ONLY soldiers have guns. Civilian survivors walk about London armed only with machetes and baseball bats (well, the occasional molotov cocktail). Effect of gun control I suppose. Find some guns dummies!
Mind you, in the sequel (28 Weeks Later) the U.S. Army arrives with tanks, Apache helicopters, .50s in sandbagged positions and snipers with M21s on rooftops.
I just figured it was more anti-gun propaganda. :rolleyes:
Defion69
01-22-2008, 12:44
I got a good laugh reading this thread.
How about the good guys always calmly and in slow-motion walk away from a large explosion behind them. Usually a building explosion...and as the good guys walk away (sometimes with his female companion at his side), he has this menacing look on his face "that's right...I'm bad".
On the other hand...a grenade or other type of small explosion will send no less than two bad guys flying through the air.
I am surprised that you missed this one...
I learned that No magazine fed weapon is ever carried with a round in the chamber (especially pistols). In fact most of the time a round is only ever chambered to show the person (after much discussion) that you are pointing your weapon at that you are finally really serious about shooting them. Otherwise you can cover a bad guy with an empty chamber, until just before you pull the trigger.
This is really annoying when an actor must rack a round into the chamber AFTER a gun battle. :rolleyes:
GLOCKS have a trigger that needs cocking before it will fire, CSI Miami. Every time he draws his GLOCK he cocks it.
Bracholi
02-17-2008, 10:51
I like that when a certain hero drops his gun (while standing on the outside of a fast moving truck) his pursuing partners while trying to catch up can clearly see the weapon on the side of the road, pick it up, and not lose any ground in the chase. :rolleyes:
When a fired shotgun round is ejected and hits the floor, it makes the same "ping" sound as rifle brass hitting the floor.
You can travel anywhere in the world without directions, compass, map, gps, sun, stars.
The kill zone of a hand grenade is roughly 50 meters. A bathtub provides adequate cover from shrapnel. A grenade thrown into a building will kill everyone inside, unless they take cover in the aforementioned tub.
Gun fire and explosions cause no hearing damage, even when used in very small confines with no hearing protection.
Fire puts out no heat. As long as you avoid the flames themselves, the inside of an incinerator is perfectly safe.
dr. mabuse
06-22-2010, 08:35
*
dr. mabuse
06-22-2010, 08:36
*
PedOncoDoc
06-22-2010, 08:38
Don't all women do that???
Taken out of context to Broadsword's post, but in context to this thread makes for a good laugh. :D
I'll leave it at that.
dr. mabuse
06-22-2010, 08:45
*
An enemy will always come to a halt during his patrol at the exact spot the hero is hiding
CAS is 5 seconds out of range, without coordinates, in the middle of hostile territory.
Riding a wheelie during a motorcycle chase is an necessary escape maneuver.
Civilians will shout and shake their fist after you steal their bicycle.
The best way to infiltrate the enemy encampment is with high explosives, especially if you are part of a search and rescue operation.
"Kill him" really means "Take 20 men and get your ass kicked"
If you need to breach a steel door simply throw a pipe bomb from 10 meters away.
The M60 is most accurate as a hip fire weapon
Every hero can track the villain to his safehouse hundreds of miles of away on foot after he is assumed to be dead.
The best way to escape is to send martial arts masters after the hero.
GT Kevin
07-20-2010, 03:31
One guy with a 9mm side arm is superior to any amount of SWAT or Special Operations Personnel.
Why send the military when you can send Jack Bauer.
Air Force One has the ground handling capabilities that would rival most sports cars.
The SAS has no idea how to deal with a sniper but an EOD guy uses Kentucky windage better than Davy Crockett ever dreamed possible. At least that's a better explanation than the automatic scope doping done.
Don't mess with Navy cooks.
The "crew" in crew serve weapons is merely a suggestion.
Diving out of a building that is about to blow up will save your life regardless of the amount of ordnance used to cause the explosion, as long as the dive is through a plate glass window.
And I hate to say it but according to Hollywood most QP's leave the military in an effort to start their new careers as the henchmen for criminal masterminds.
The number one thing I have learned from movies is to count the amount of rounds fired from a revolver, "I know what your thinking did I fire six shots or only five.....do you feel lucky? Well do ya punk" :munchin
TOMAHAWK9521
07-20-2010, 04:32
Only former QP's are officers. All Rangers have tattoos, and the same tattoo for that matter.
-When you have a small unit of less than 12 men, all 12 will carry different weapons, sharing no common caliber or gauge.
-There is never any need to share magazines from one member to another.
-All ammo is rucked in even on the deepest jungle op. No one ever carries an ammo box. No caches or airdrop resupply needed.
-Exfil is always carried out by the lowest bid, least reliable contractor avalible.
-Medics can fix anything with a triangular bandage carried on their own LCE.
-When medics fail to save the team member, they must throw a bloody semi-soaked bandage at the corpse.
-No one ever carries body bags.
Political integrity:
Capt Renault: "I'm shocked, shocked to find that gambling is going on here!"
Dealer: "Your winnings, sir."
Capt Renault: "Oh, thank you very much."
(~ Casablanca, 1942)
And can transition from primary to secondary to land multiple headshots in under 2 seconds.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LMzya7atHCY
Team Sergeant
07-25-2010, 12:02
And can transition from primary to secondary to land multiple headshots in under 2 seconds.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LMzya7atHCY
Unrealistic, the rabbit comes off the scope after making a very nice shot..... never come off the scope when you're dialed in!
That was funny as hell, I'd like to see that in English....
Unrealistic, the rabbit comes off the scope after making a very nice shot..... never come off the scope when you're dialed in!
That was funny as hell, I'd like to see that in English....
The first episode, of which all the trailer scenes come from, was just release last week. I downloaded it off of bittorrent to tide me over until it becomes available for purchase. It was in Japanese, with English subtitles. The sniper rabbit's voice was a little annoying, but other than that it was incredibly fun to watch. It is some of the details that really make it- watching the characters chamber check and rig up a claymore.
Wanted to update the list ....
* All telephone numbers in America begin with the digits 555.
* Medieval peasants had perfect teeth.
* The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there, and you can travel to any other part of the building you want without difficulty.
* Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant.
* It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.
* A cough is usually the sign of a terminal illness.
* If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.
* No matter how badly a spaceship is attacked, its internal gravity system is never damaged.
* The more a man and a woman hate each other, the more likely they will fall in love.
* All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they’re going to go off.
* Cars that crash will almost always burst into flames.
* A cup of black coffee or a splash of cold water in the face is enough to render the most inebriated person stone cold sober.
* If you try hard enough, you can outrun an explosion.
* If you stick your head out of cover during a gun fight, it will never be hit, especially if you look backwards to hold a conversation with someone behind you.
* Police Departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are assigned partners who are their total opposite.
* Honest and hard working policemen are traditionally gunned down three days before their retirement.
* You’re very likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.
* Computers never display a cursor on screen but always say: Enter Password Now.
* All watches and clocks are synchronized to the second.
* No matter how fuzzy the photograph, it can be enlarged and enhanced to show the finest detail.
* Nearly everyone speaks English, no matter where they are from. Even aliens from outer space, despite the fact they have never been to Earth, seen an Earthling, or even heard of Earth or Earthlings.
* No matter how catastrophic the disaster, pets will always survive it.
* There will always be a doctor in a plane or building with the right medical supplies.
All hand grenades are filled with Napalm
A M203 can level a 3 story building (and is also loaded with Napalm)
The Villian will always be able to absorb at least 3 rounds to the chest before expiring
All vehicles expload when shot
All vehicles exploading when shot will rise a minimum of 3 feet in the air
All spaceships that expload in space are also filled with napalm and a magical substance that causes them to continue to burn even while lacking oxygen to do so.
All spaceships that expload in space are extremely loud when exploading
The car you land on when falling from a high building always has an alarm
An arrow never misses and is always fatal
An M60 isn't as heavy as you thought
Female Irish peasants are Redheads and always Hot
Torches burn forever
A thrown knife will always enter the Sternum or the Skull right above the nose
A Thrown Axe will enter the skull above the nose if your target is facing you, and between the shoulder blades if your target is facing away (and it never misses)
:munchin
SouthernDZ
12-02-2011, 06:29
To emphasize they mean business, the hero will jack a round into the pump shotgun (you mean all this time there was no round chambered?)
A LAW fired at any object will completely destroy it.:lifter
Ret10Echo
12-02-2011, 06:49
All vehicles expload when shot
All vehicles exploading when shot will rise a minimum of 3 feet in the air
The corollary to this is that only Jeeps with full roll-cages flip over....after rising 3 feet in the air and before exploding.
greenberetTFS
12-02-2011, 07:13
After watching Rambo I felt cheated that they(SFTG) didn't give me any training on flying a helicopter..........:rolleyes:
Big Teddy :munchin
A LAW fired at any object will completely destroy it.:lifter
And is also filled with napalm
You can hold a normal conversation in the back of a C-130 in flight, as well as not even having to worry about hearing protection.
Delta Force motorbikes might have guided missiles, but Mega Force motorbikes can fly.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O1NpZxn860M
Turkish Rambo taught me everything I need to know about unarmed CQB, and light anti-armor drills
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3l72gxO2l2E
Bollywood taught me how to properly slide under a semi-trailer on horseback after using my testicles and a lamp post like a retard strong Indian MacGyver to steal the horse.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a9H6GHNFsXI
According to the movies it's quite easy to travel around the world instantly and with ease, with no travel documentation, no money, no weapons, no language/cultural skills, no local contacts, and no support team to break stuff and/or shoot people in the face in non permissive environments because local security forces are non-existent or border line retarded.
Ninja throwing stars with very short blades, penetrating maybe one inch, are instantly lethal even though they never seem to qualify as a circuitry shot or even a hydraulic shot.
Badger52
05-20-2015, 07:00
It only takes 3-4 seconds to clear even a 3-BR ranch-style house; after which, consecutive & concurring shouts of "CLEAR!" are required.
Every woman has a blemish free & very pert rack :D