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Since this is 'The Comedy Zone' - I will attempt to translate the overly scientific themes found within this deeply cerebral news story from fox news...
icy cold global warming and puffy white climate change pounded the West this winter. Lower elevations are measuring rain in feet, while ski resorts are measuring puffy white climate change in stories. Let's take a look at how the record amounts of puffy white climate change in the western mountains compares across the U.S.A.
Fluffy white Climate Change at the peak of Mammoth Mountain for the 2022-23 season has measured 864 inches. In layman's terms, that is literally, a metric shit ton of global warming - nearly as high as an average seven-story building. The lodge at the Mammoth Mountain Ski Resort has seen an all-time record of 58.5 feet of fluffy white climate change this season.
That icy cold global warming was so deep in Mammoth Lakes, California that one family had to dig a tunnel through the fluffy white climate change. The record amount of puffy climate change may have excited many of the skiers at the local resorts, but others saw the record global warming accumulation for what it really was - proof that ski lifts would be rendered obsolete if this global warming trend continues. Another season of this much climate change would mean that the fluffy white climate change is twice as high as the ski lift...
...this makes plenty of sense considering that most of the fucking morons that live in kowlifornya spend their days twice as high as the rest of the nation's citizens.
Of course, this trend bled into Michigan and New York which were both "almost" twice as high as they usually are, and Arizona which was two and a half times higher than usual.
...this year's global warming seems to have gotten everyone twice as high as they usually are.
If that isn't enough to convince you climate deniers - the article goes on to say, "Mount Baker's snow would come two-thirds of the way up the Statue of Liberty's pedestal. Without the pedestal, Mount Baker's snow would come up just past her chin"
Snow is made out of water - and that means there is enough fluffy white climate change for the Statue of Liberty to be underwater because of global climate warming changes and that means one thing...
AL.MOTHER.FUCKING.GORE.WAS.RIGHT.
ManBearPig is here to collect - and he brought his fucking skis.
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Opinions stated in this post are solely those of the author, and in no way reflect the opinions or policies of The Department of Defense, The United States Army, The Royal Canadian Mounted Police, The Screen Actors Guild, The Boy Scouts, The Good, The Bad, or The Ugly. These opinions are provided purely as overly sarcastic social commentary and are not meant to be used for mission planning or navigation.
"Make sure your own mask is secure before assisting others"
-Airplane Safety Briefing
Last edited by Box; 04-01-2023 at 14:50.
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