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Old 04-23-2006, 20:19   #1
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Location: Virginia
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A different discussion on deployments

Apolagies if this is in the wrong thread, I figured here or General Discussion might be the best, please move if needed.
On topic, I was wondering how you QPs with families and wives/girlfriends handle the stress of deployments. I know the Army has put a ton of effort into family support groups, but what else have you personally done "behind the scenes" to help ease the tension and stress?
A little background, my unit is gearing up for a year long deployment (not sure exactly how much I'm allowed to say because of opsec), but it's not to Iraq, Aghanistan, or any of the "hot spots". I can tell my family is a little stressed out, but they're not saying too much - at least not to me. My father was 22 years military, so they're a little used to deployments. My girlfriend (serious relationship, year and a half) on the other hand, has been driving me bonkers. She's in the Guard, but hasn't been for that long and hasn't delt with any deployments.

What does a QP, or any soldier for that matter, do to help ease the stress and nervousness for all parties involved in a deployment?

Thank you,
PFC Fonz
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Old 04-23-2006, 22:31   #2
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Girlfriends are a strange animal...depends how well she's integrated herself with the other spouses in your unit. Would introduce her to some of the other significant others before departing...add her to the FRG call list (if she likes). That way she'll get the calls etc on when you're coming home and any unit social events or get togethers they may be having while you're gone.

Def give her a mailing address. Depending on where you're going and what you're doing, you may or may not have e-mail access...which will help help or hurt.

Would def plan on writing her while gone.

Also, Saw a book this weekend, Separated by Duty.
Haven't read it, but it looked decent. Check out the site.
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Old 04-28-2006, 08:36   #3
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From a female perspective...girlfriends can go either way, bad or good. A lot of family support is great, i.e. - someone she can pick up the phone from your family to reassure her when days get long. A hobby, job or school is the best thing for a girlfriend. A busy mind is a quiet mind. Also, as far as family members, they get used to the idea....just try to stay in touch as frequently as possible, even if it is a two word email "I'm OK". It helps everyone to know that you aren't worrying about things you cannot control while you are gone. Don't let anyone's actions at home stress YOU out. Once they pick up on you freaking out, they will do it more to get your undivided attention.
Good luck on your trip and be safe, feel free to PM me with questions or comments or requests.
The question is never simply IF someone is lying, it's WHY. - Lie To Me

We must always fear the wicked. But there is another kind of evil that we must fear the most, and that is the indifference of good men - Boondock Saints

Iraq was never lost and Afghanistan was never quite the easy good war. Those in the media too often pile on and follow the polls rather than offer independent analysis. Campaign rhetoric and politics are one thing - the responsibility of governance is quite another.
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Old 05-05-2006, 09:57   #4
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I meant to hit the search button first...
More to follow...

Last edited by SRT31B; 05-05-2006 at 10:02.
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Old 05-05-2006, 10:25   #5
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Yep, I found it... disregard last...

Man, I was almost "that guy."

One more time around the perimeter...
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Old 05-05-2006, 11:17   #6
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"Stress of deployments"? Has something changed?

I've been foward deployed for the last 16 years. My question is, "Where the hell is everybody else?"
Somewhere a True Believer is training to kill you. He is training with minimal food or water, in austere conditions, training day and night. The only thing clean on him is his weapon and he made his web gear. He doesn't worry about what workout to do - his ruck weighs what it weighs, his runs end when the enemy stops chasing him. This True Believer is not concerned about 'how hard it is;' he knows either he wins or dies. He doesn't go home at 17:00, he is home.
He knows only The Cause.

Still want to quit?
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