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Old 03-02-2021, 23:33   #1
Box
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Beware the Ides of March

It's that time of year again people. I feel it is my duty to take up the mantle of Spurinna - beware the Ides of March and the days that follow for you are all in danger. It is this time of year that visits terrible plagues upon mankind...

In 44 BC conspirators stabbed Caesar to death right in front of the Roman Senate

In the 5th Century St Patrick chased all the snakes out of Ireland causing Jameson Whisky to turn green for several days each year.

The clocks are going to mysteriously jump us all an hour into the future

Czar Nicholas abdicated his throne

Germany invaded Czechoslovakia

CBS canceled the Ed Sullivan Show

SARS

Cricket was invented, leading to that age-old question, "Cricket, isn't that just European Baseball?"

Tom Hanks savagely unleashed movies like "Splash" and "The Money Pit" on innocent civilians.

The USA initiated a 2-week lockdown to "flatten the curve" from a deadly virus so horrible that only 99.8 percent of civilization has any hope of survival.

Now, in 2021, Nancy Pelosi thinks that she should have access to Joe Bidens nuclear football...
...you know, because - you know, the thing


This shit just isn't funny anymore.
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Old 03-03-2021, 05:55   #2
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Now, in 2021, Nancy Pelosi thinks that she should have access to Joe Bidens nuclear football...
...you know, because - you know, the thing


This shit just isn't funny anymore.
No, it isn't
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Old 03-03-2021, 09:18   #3
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Originally Posted by Box View Post

Now, in 2021, Nancy Pelosi thinks that she should have access to Joe Bidens nuclear football...
...you know, because - you know, the thing


This shit just isn't funny anymore.
Correctomundo...Sort of reminds me of a crappy stand up comic with bad jokes.... it's like walking through that door knowing there is danger on the other side..
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Old 03-03-2021, 09:35   #4
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Sort of reminds me of a crappy stand up comic with bad jokes....
She actually reminds me of Shelly Marsh - I can even see her stirring her evil witches brew of leftist hatred while she's chants her curses upon the right side of America:


Furniture polish, paint thinner and bleach...
...Ammonia and antifreeze. One tablespoon each.

I hate everybody, I just like to read...
...Republicans are stupid and won't legalize weed.

So with this eldritch potion and these ancient words...
...I take my revenge on Republican turds.




just my two cents
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Old 03-03-2021, 11:02   #5
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Originally Posted by Box View Post
She actually reminds me of Shelly Marsh - I can even see her stirring her evil witches brew of leftist hatred while she's chants her curses upon the right side of America:


Furniture polish, paint thinner and bleach...
...Ammonia and antifreeze. One tablespoon each.

I hate everybody, I just like to read...
...Republicans are stupid and won't legalize weed.

So with this eldritch potion and these ancient words...
...I take my revenge on Republican turds.




just my two cents

I think your "two cents" just cursed us, or we are transforming into Kermit the Frog...Bahahahaha...Hopefully you have an antidote handy.....
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Old 03-03-2021, 13:55   #6
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I'd prefer you not drag Kermit the Frog into this thread. The muppets are rife with negative stereotypes, cultural microaggressions, and out right bigotry. That as well as the problem that I sense a bit of trans-phobia in your comment about transformation. On the mater of an antidote - I cannot say for sure, but there are rumors that Shelly Marsh's recipe is actually the secret ingredients used in 'woke kool aid'
...if that is true, there is no antidote

There is no antidote, no cure, no hope.

All that being said,
This is the comedy zone - lets not invite ANY of the muppets and their negative stereotypes, cultural microaggressions, and out right bigotry into our happy little safe place.





Thank you and have a wonderful day.
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Last edited by Box; 03-03-2021 at 13:59.
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Old 03-04-2021, 15:29   #7
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. On the mater of an antidote - I cannot say for sure, but there are rumors that Shelly Marsh's recipe is actually the secret ingredients used in 'woke kool aid'
...if that is true, there is no antidote

There is no antidote, no cure, no hope.
Well, if there is no antidote, no cure or hope then we might as well stock up on alcoholic beverages and have a good time....hahaha...
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Old 03-04-2021, 21:00   #8
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...we might as well stock up on alcoholic beverages
Now you're talking. For mid-March booze, I would recommend at least one bottle of Jameson. It is the perfect balance of spicy, nutty and vanilla notes with hints of sweet sherry and exceptional smoothness that really hits the spot around St Patricks Day

A good Irish Whiskey is just what the doctor ordered to help survive the Ides of March and the evil that follows...

Two bottles would be even better.
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Old 03-05-2021, 11:47   #9
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Agreed...I'm not a whiskey drinker, but maybe I ought to start just to survive the evils of hexes and dark witchcraft potions.....plus I could use a few stiff drinks at the moment......
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Old 03-05-2021, 12:14   #10
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Now you're talking. For mid-March booze, I would recommend at least one bottle of Jameson. It is the perfect balance of spicy, nutty and vanilla notes with hints of sweet sherry and exceptional smoothness that really hits the spot around St Patricks Day


A good Irish Whiskey is just what the doctor ordered to help survive the Ides of March and the evil that follows...
Two bottles would be even better.
Agreed..

But, Boris(my cuz from another bar) is wheeling & dealing with Sniffy Joe..

Quote:
PSA
Whisky tariff drops from 25% to ZERO %

The United States will now temporarily suspend all retaliatory tariffs on direct exports from the UK after a settlement agreement over the Airbus despite.

It means Scotch whisky will now see its tariffs go from 25 per cent to 0 per cent, as will textiles such as cashmere.

https://www.scotsman.com/news/politi...eement-3154414
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Old 03-05-2021, 16:51   #11
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Two bottles would be even better.

Two is one, one is none.
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Old 03-06-2021, 06:58   #12
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Two is one, one is none.
But two plus one...is 3!
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Old 03-06-2021, 13:40   #13
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But two plus one...is 3!
Might as well go for the case....
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Old 03-06-2021, 14:57   #14
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But two plus one...is 3!
There you go with that racist math.

Here's how it goes:

One for you.
One for me.
One for you.

Wait. That's not fair. Let's start over...

One for me.
One for you.
One for me.

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Old 03-06-2021, 22:13   #15
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One for me...

fuck off
More for me
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