Super Bowl Security

[Team Sergeant]

Living close to the University of Phoenix stadium is amusing. 2nd Super Bowl and you would not believe the "Security".


So far we have:

NEST (Nuclear emergency search team)

FBI

DHS

The X Men

FEMA

DHS

Professional "Contract Security" (blackwater?)

The Justice League

DOJ

Mobile Water Boarding Units (disguised as ESPN trucks) have also been deployed at the East and West Parking lots.

DHS

25% of all Arizona state law enforcement assets

Arizona National Guard

Jack Bauer

Blackhawks & F-16's

Luke AFB is running air defense missions (no really)

DHS

Arizona Fusions centers are running at 125%

(Captain America declined to attend due to his dislike of either team )

Federal radiation detection teams

HAZMAT teams

NSA has set up 200 fake cell towers around the stadium and is capturing all electronic transmissions.

Every politician (and billionaire) will be escorted by a member of SEAL Team Six or Delta Force.

63 federal DHS "snipers" were deployed last week and are currently in Super Bowl "hides". The media was asked not to
film these hides.

Running short on federal SWAT teams, the Dept. of Education was asked to deploy their SWAT team to guard the Gov of Arizona at the game.

A team of federal judges are on stand-by to issue warrants on a first come first call basis. Their HQ is a closely guarded secret but we have intel that they will be stationed at a local Irish Pub close to the stadium.

The NFL has placed a "kill on sight" order for anyone selling counterfeit NFL jerseys. US Customs agents will be executing the kill orders, taking their orders directly from NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell to fulfill the NFL's anti- counterfeit mission.

The Secret Service (in cooperation with the NSA) plans to publish all out of town private Escort services phone numbers for game weekend.

The Arizona National Guard in conjunction with the CIA will deploy 20 armed drones will be conducting an air-cap within a 20mile radius of the Univ of Phoenix Stadium.

More to follow.......