ARE YOU?? Older Than Dirt?

[BMT (RIP)]

Someone asked the other
day, 'What was your favorite fast food when you were growing up?'

'We didn't have fast food when I was
growing up,' I informed him. 'All the food was slow.'
'C'mon,
seriously. Where did you eat?'

'It was a place called 'at home,'' I explained. ! ' Mom cooked every day and
when Dad got home from work, we sat down together at the dining room table,
and if I didn't like what she put on my plate I was allowed to sit there until
I did like it.'

By this
time, the kid was laughing so hard I was afraid he was going to suffer serious
internal damage, so I didn't tell him the part about how I had to have
permission to leave the table. But here are some other things I would have
told him about my childhood if I figured his system could have handled it

Some parents NEVER! owned their
own house, wore Levis, set foot on a golf course, traveled out of the country
or had a credit card. In their later years they had something called a
revolving charge card. The card was good only at Sears Roebuck. Or maybe it
was Sears & Roebuck . Either way, there is no Roebuck anymore. Maybe he
died.

My parents never drove me to soccer practice. This was mostly because we never
had heard of soccer. I had a bicycle that weighed probably 50 pounds, and only
had one speed, (slow). We didn't have a television in our house until I was 5.
It was, of course, black and white,

I was 13 before I tasted my first pizza, it wascalled 'pizza pie.' When I bit into it, I burned the roof of my mouth and the
cheese slid off, swung down, plastered itself against my chin and burned that,too. It's still the best pizza I ever had.

We didn't have a car until I was 4. It was an old
black Dodge.
I never had a telephone in my room. The only phone in the
house was in the living room and it was on a party line. Before you could
dial, you had to listen and make sure some people you didn't know weren't
already using the line.
Pizzaswere not delivered to our home. But milk was.
All newspapers were delivered by boys and all boys delivered
newspapers my brother delivered a newspaper, six days a week. It cost 7 cents
a paper, of which he got to keep 2 cents. He had to get up at6AM every morning. On Saturday, he had to collect the 42 cents from his
customers. His favorite customers were the ones who gave him 50 cents and told
him to keep the change. His least favorite customers were the ones who seemed
to never be home on collection day.

Movie stars kissed with their mouths shut. At least, they did in the
movies. Touching someone else's tongue with yours was called French kissing
and they didn't do that in movies. I don't know what they did in French
movies. French movies were dirty and we weren't allowed to see them.

If you grew up in a
generation before there was fast food, you may want to share some of these
memories with your children or grandchildren. Just don't blame me if they bust
a gut laughing.




Growing up isn't
what it used to be, is it?
MEMORIES from a friend
My Dad is
cleaning out my grandmother's house (she died in December) and he brought me
an old Royal Crown Cola bottle. In the bottle top was a stopper with a bunch
of holes in it. I knew immediately what it was, but my daughter had no idea.
She thought they had tried to make it a salt shaker or something. I knew it as
the bottle that sat on the end of the ironing board to 'sprinkle' clothes with
because we didn't have steam irons. Man, I am old.

How many do you remember?

Head lights
dimmer switches on the floor.
Ignition switches on the dashboard.

Heaters mounted on the inside of the fire wall.
Real ice
boxes.
Pant leg clips for bicycles without chain guards.

Soldering irons you heat on a gas burner.
Using hand signals for cars
without turn signals.

Older Than Dirt Quiz
Count all the ones that you remember not
the ones you were told about

Ratings at the bottom.
1.Blackjack chewing gum
2. Wax Coke-shaped bottles with colored sugar
water
3. Candy cigarettes
4. Soda pop machines that
dispensed glass bottles
5. Coffee shops or diners with tableside juke
boxes
6 . Home milk delivery in glass bottles with cardboard stoppers
7. Party lines
8. Newsreels before the movie
9.P..F. Flyers
10. Butch wax
11. TV test patterns that came on
at night after the last show and were there until TV shows started again in
the morning. (there were only 3 channels)
12. Peashooters
13. Howdy Doody
14. 45 RPM records
15. S& H greenstamps
16 Hi-fi's
17. Metal ice trays with lever
18.Mimeograph paper
19. Blue flashbulb
20. Packards
21.Roller skate keys
22. Cork popguns
23. Drive-ins
24. Studebakers
25. Wash tub wringers

If you
remembered 0-5 = You're still young
If you remembered 6-10 = You are
getting older
If you remembered 11-15 = Don't tell your age,

If you remembered 16-25 = You're older than dirt!

I might be
older than dirt but those memories are the best part of my life.


Don't forget to pass this along!!
Especially to all your
really OLD friends...