Here's two I got today!

[SF18C]

Hit Man

Two old friends were just about to tee off a the the first hole of their local golf course when a guy carrying a golf bag called out to them.

"Do you mind if I join you? My partner didn't turn up."

"Sure," they said, "You're welcome." So they started playing and enjoyed the game and the company of the newcomer.

Part way around the course, one of the friends asked the newcomer, "What do you do for a living?"

"I'm a hit man," was the reply.

"Your joking!" was the response.

"No, I'm not," he said, reaching into his golf bag and pulling out a beautiful Mauser action sniper rifle with a large telescopic sight. "Here are my tools."

"That's a beautiful telescopic sight!," said the other friend, "Can I take a look? I think I might be able to see my house from here."

So he picked up the rifle and looked through the sight in the direction of the house. "Yes, I can see my house all right. This sight is fantastic. I can see right through the window." "Wow, I can see my wife in the bedroom. HA Ha, I can see she's naked!!! Wait a minute, that's my neighbor in there with her.....He's naked, too!!!!

He turned to the hit man, "How much do you charge for a hit?"

"I'll do a flat rate, for you, one thousand dollars every time I pull the trigger."

"Can you do two for me now?"

"Sure, what do you want?"

"First, shoot my wife, she's always been mouthy, so shoot her in the mouth. Then the neighbor, he's a friend of mine, so just shoot him in the groin to tech him a lesson."

The hit man took the rifle and took aim, standing perfectly still for a few minutes.

"Are you going to do it or not?" said the friend impatiently.

"Just be patient," said the hit man calmly, "I think I can save you a grand here...."


The plan:



1) Back off and allow those men who want to marry men, marry men.

2) Allow those women who want to marry women, marry women.

3) Allow those folks who want to abort their babies, abort their babies.

4) In three generations, there will be no democrats!!!

Man, I love it when a plan comes together!