02-16-2005, 11:43
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#1
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Quiet Professional
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: east coast
Posts: 607
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Only in Bizzarro World
It is beyond my limited comprehension how anyone - even the squibs - could sit around in a room and say "Attack Submarine Jimmy Carter, yea yea, that will strike fear in their hearts" - we'll name it that. My new definition of irony - the words attack and Jimmy Carter linked forever.
Whats next? The Barney Frank Recon Kill Tank? John Edwards Fighting Knives?
Navy to Commission Attack Submarine Jimmy Carter
Story Number: NNS050215-14
Release Date: 2/15/2005 7:01:00 PM
Special release from the U.S. Department of Defense
WASHINGTON (NNS) -- The Navy will commission its newest nuclear-powered attack submarine Jimmy Carter Feb. 19, during an 11 a.m. EST ceremony at Naval Submarine Base New London, Groton, Conn.
The attack submarine Jimmy Carter honors the 39th president of the United States.
President Carter is the only U.S. president to have qualified in submarines. He has distinguished himself by a lifetime of public service, and has long ties to the Navy and the submarine force. Carter graduated from the U.S. Naval Academy in 1946, served as a commissioned officer aboard submarines, and served as commander-in-chief from 1977 to 1981. Carter's statesmanship, philanthropy and sense of humanity earned him the Nobel Peace Prize in 2002.
Retired Adm. Stansfield Turner, a classmate of the president who served in the Carter administration as the director of the Central Intelligence Agency, will deliver the ceremony's principal address. Rosalynn Carter is the sponsor for the ship named for her husband, with daughter Amy serving as matron of honor. In a time-honored Navy tradition, Rosalynn Carter will give the first order to "man our ship and bring her to life!"
Jimmy Carter is the third and final submarine of the Seawolf class. As the most advanced submarine in the class, Jimmy Carter will have built-in flexibility and an array of new warfighting features that will enable it to prevail in any scenario, against any threat – from beneath Arctic ice to shallow water. Differentiating Jimmy Carter from all other undersea vessels is its multimission platform (MMP), which includes a 100-foot hull extension to enhance payload capability. The MMP will enable Jimmy Carter to accommodate the advanced technology required to develop and test a new generation of weapons, sensors and undersea vehicles for naval special warfare, tactical surveillance and mine-warfare operations.
Capt. Robert D. Kelso, a native of Fayetteville, Tenn., will serve as Jimmy Carter’s first commanding officer, leading a crew of approximately 130 officers and sailors. Built by General Dynamics Electric Boat in Groton, Conn., the 12,130-ton Jimmy Carter is 453 feet in length, has a beam of 40 feet, and can operate at speeds exceeding 25 knots when submerged.
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casey is offline
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02-16-2005, 12:26
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#2
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Guerrilla Chief
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Vancouver (Not BC), Washington (Not DC)
Posts: 505
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Well, if it doesn't inspire fear, at least the enemy will know that when USS Jimmy Carter is on station off of their coast that they "Just want to talk."
OR
At least the civies in enemy territory will know that anything that sub destroys will be rebuilt by her namesake.
Nah, how about...
She's been modified to fire the newest SLCM... the Tomahawk BS-Mod. The misslie is identical to its counterparts, only the warhead is filled with 1800lbs of bullshit, 150 lbs of glitter, and 50 pounds of perfume. A spokesman for the US Navy was quoted as saying "When the warhead detonates, everything in the target area gets covered in a shiney, pleasant smelling coating of bullshit. It doesn't really do anything, but it looks like it does."
And finally, in a related development, China announced today that they have completed construction of their "Rabbit Class" Submarines. These subs are specifically designed to defend against the USS Jimmy Carter...
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OK, I don't know how thrilled I'd be to be issued a USS Jimmy Carter ball cap and be required to wear it.
__________________
"How can a pacifist, tolerant anti-violence, anti-hunting, anti Second Amendment, anti-self-defense group turn to violence against a party that is pro- all of that?" - The Reaper, 11Oct04 14:42hrs
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Bravo1-3 is offline
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02-16-2005, 12:55
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#3
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Quiet Professional
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Free Pineland
Posts: 24,813
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It was the Navy's payback to the Dems for naming the latest CVN the USS Ronald Reagan while he was still alive.
On the humor side, would you be more afraid of a nuclear carrier named after the Gipper, or an oddball attack sub named for the Peanut Head?
TR
__________________
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat." - President Theodore Roosevelt, 1910
De Oppresso Liber 01/20/2025
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The Reaper is offline
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02-16-2005, 13:04
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#4
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Area Commander
Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: The Black Hills of SD
Posts: 5,944
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Hey....it can track Whale Migrations. That'd keep those Green Peace Nazis happy.
__________________
Non Sibi Sed Suis
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It's Good To Be Da King !!!! Just ask NDD !!!! 
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Sdiver is offline
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02-16-2005, 14:57
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#5
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Quiet Professional
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Vermont
Posts: 3,093
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They are probably going to tie it up in the Panama Canal and open up a floating Habitat for Humanity.
Jack Moroney
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Wenn einer von uns fallen sollt, der Andere steht für zwei.
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Jack Moroney (RIP) is offline
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02-16-2005, 18:28
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#6
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Auxiliary
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Houston
Posts: 90
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We got invited to go to the commish deal today.
Nothing like teaching Sailors Force Protection when there are Dog and Pony's going on. HAHAH
Should have seen the look of the Cadets from West Point when they saw Sailors doing IBT... HAHAHA
Good shit.
RAT OUT!!!
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Lets have some fun in the sun and sand.
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RAT is offline
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02-16-2005, 19:37
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#7
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Quiet Professional
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Phoenix, AZ
Posts: 20,929
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Jack Moroney
They are probably going to tie it up in the Panama Canal and open up a floating Habitat for Humanity.
Jack Moroney
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This put tears in my eyes.....
Good one Sir.
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Team Sergeant is offline
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02-19-2005, 23:38
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#8
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Quiet Professional
Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Ohio
Posts: 982
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by Jack Moroney
They are probably going to tie it up in the Panama Canal and open up a floating Habitat for Humanity.
Jack Moroney
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Sir,
It's because of "O's" like you I had such a good time on a Team. I would like to sit down and have a drink with you one day.
Doc
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Doc is offline
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02-20-2005, 02:05
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#9
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Guerrilla Chief
Join Date: Mar 2004
Location: Vancouver (Not BC), Washington (Not DC)
Posts: 505
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I hear the subs motto is
"USS Jimmy Carter, We're long, hard, and full of Seamen... and we have lust in our hearts."
__________________
"How can a pacifist, tolerant anti-violence, anti-hunting, anti Second Amendment, anti-self-defense group turn to violence against a party that is pro- all of that?" - The Reaper, 11Oct04 14:42hrs
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Bravo1-3 is offline
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