03-27-2010, 14:05
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#1
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Area Commander
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Cochise Co., AZ
Posts: 6,204
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Drunk Pa. Man Tried To 'Revive' Opossum
Quote:
PUNXSUTAWNEY, Pa. (AP) ―
State police have charged a central Pennsylvania man with public drunkenness after he was seen giving mouth-to-mouth "resuscitation" to a long-dead opossum along a highway.
Trooper Jamie Levier says several witnesses saw 55-year-old Donald Wolfe, of Brookville, near the animal along Route 36 in Oliver Township Thursday about 3 p.m. The trooper says one person saw Wolfe kneeling before the animal and gesturing as though he were conducting a seance, while another saw the mouth-to-mouth attempt.
Levier says Wolfe was "extremely intoxicated" and "did have his mouth in the area of the animal's mouth, I guess."
Oliver Township is about 65 miles northeast of Pittsburgh.
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He must have thought it was Punxsutawney Phil. 
Pat
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PSM is offline
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03-27-2010, 14:35
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#2
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Asset
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Ohio
Posts: 41
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Wow
That is amazing. Needed a good laugh, thanks. (Here's your sign...) 
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Triman19 is offline
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03-27-2010, 15:58
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#3
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Guerrilla Chief
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: PWC
Posts: 529
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Quote:
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Wolfe was "extremely intoxicated" and "did have his mouth in the area of the animal's mouth, I guess."
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Who knows, maybe he struck out that night and this was the first (semi-) warm body he could find for a goodnight kiss.
It is Pennsyl-tucky, after all.
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Доверяй, но проверяй (trust, but verify)
"A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher a hog, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects." - Robert A. Heinlein, The Notebooks of Lazarus Long
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Masochist is offline
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03-27-2010, 16:43
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#4
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Area Commander
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: USA-Germany
Posts: 1,574
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Don't Ask Don't Tell
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akv is offline
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03-27-2010, 20:04
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#5
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Area Commander
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Clay House Stuttgart, Germany
Posts: 2,675
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Gross, but not as bad as the guy in my county who got stinking drunk and then tried to make love to his neighbor's pony. He went to jail for it and also got his picture in the local newspaper.
Last edited by mojaveman; 03-28-2010 at 21:17.
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mojaveman is offline
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03-28-2010, 08:58
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#6
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Area Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 2,952
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Masochist
Who knows, maybe he struck out that night and this was the first (semi-) warm body he could find for a goodnight kiss.
It is Pennsyl-tucky, after all. |
Wannabe Veterinarian nabbed in the midst of a random act of lunacy. Pretty damned funny Pat!!
RF 1
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Red Flag 1 is offline
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01-05-2011, 01:08
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#8
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Guerrilla Chief
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Southern Arizona
Posts: 590
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WD that was great! First shot of the warthog after eating the fruit did it. Haven't laughed that hard in a while thanks...
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Δεν είμαι άξιος του σταυρού του Ιησού οπή, Andreas
Denial and inactivity prepare people well for roles of victim and corpse
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badshot is offline
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01-05-2011, 11:06
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#9
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RIP Quiet Professional
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: The Ozarks
Posts: 10,072
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PSM
He must have thought it was Punxsutawney Phil.
Pat |
How does anybody know for sure whether that possum was actually dead?
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"There you go, again." Ronald Reagan
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Dusty is offline
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01-05-2011, 19:33
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#10
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Area Commander
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 2,952
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dusty
How does anybody know for sure whether that possum was actually dead?
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Root canal without local.
RF 1
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Red Flag 1 is offline
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01-05-2011, 21:58
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#11
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Guerrilla
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Georgia
Posts: 186
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dusty
How does anybody know for sure whether that possum was actually dead?
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Maybe the possum was flat with tire tracks on it!
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"Ability is what you're capable of doing. Motivation determines what you do. Attitude determines how well you do it." Lou Holtz
SFA M-12786
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cetheridge is offline
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01-05-2011, 11:06
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#12
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Guerrilla
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: st louis mo.
Posts: 315
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PSM
He must have thought it was Punxsutawney Phil.
Pat |
he obviously is not aware of what possums eat 
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Isaiah 2:17
The arrogance of man will be brought low
and the pride of men humbled;
the LORD alone will be exalted in that day,
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dadof18x'er is offline
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01-05-2011, 16:36
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#13
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Quiet Professional
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: State of confusion
Posts: 1,566
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knock it off guys - I thought it was the midget who I had been out drinking with earlier. Admittedly, she was a little hairy but after a couple bottles of Beam, who here hasn't made the same mistake....huh???
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JimP is offline
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