What are the cushiest orders you never got?

LarryW · 10-08-2009, 06:27

What are the cushiest orders you never got? There are some billets in the military that a guy shouldn't get paid to take, but they never came around me. Met an E-5 in Singapore who brought the mail down to the ship while we stopped for about 4-hours to load fuel (enroute Gulf for the 5th, 6th, who knows how many-eth times). The guy must have been about 18 years old, and an E-5! He was grumbling about just arriving in Singapore, got his lousy orders to report to the embassy. Got there and the first thing they told him was to go out in the economy and find a place to rent. Something with an installed security system. He rented a 2-BR condo with a view of the harbor. The Government picked up the tab, in addition to paying him full per diem, vehicle allowance, etc. I wanted to stuff the little squirt in a mail bag and pitch him over the side! I never got orders like that! Another was the Personnel Exchange Program (PEP) where a guy would get orders to some place like Australia for a 2-3 year tour working with the Aussie Navy. Again, apartment/condo, full per diem, vehicle allowance, no duty, no watches to stand. Just hang around with a bunch of Aussies and drink damn good beer and eat crispy stuff off the barbie! I never got orders like that!

What are the cushiest orders you never got?

caveman · 10-08-2009, 06:57

Our last CO is now in some sort of administrative position at Edelweiss, we're guessing he gives ski lessons to general officers.

mojaveman · 10-08-2009, 08:50

In September 1981 after I had arrived to HQEUCOM as a very young 95B I was told that I would be assigned to a detachment that had the sole responsibility of guarding the DCINC. He lived in a mansion in Stuttgart that sat directly next to the State Capitol of Baden Wurttemberg. The location was high on a hill and there was a beautiful view of the surrounding city. What was interesting about the assignment was the fact that he was gone about 50% of the time so we usually had the entire place to ourselves. I did that for about 18 months and compared to some of the jobs that my friends got when they arrived to USAREUR I guess I was in a pretty comfortable place. I met a number of important people while I was there including William Casey, who was the director of the CIA in 1982, General Rogers, who was the CINC, and a host of American dignitaries and foreign officers. It was a very interesting experience for a kid from California who was away from home for the first time.

f50lrrp · 10-08-2009, 09:32

I had two that I didn't get... in 1965, I was sent to Stuttgart to interview with the VII Corps General's aide to be the NCOIC of the general"s train. It seems that they wanted a single, E-5 who spoke German for the job.

The other was after my second tour in RVN, I had direct orders to be the NCOIC of the Garmisch Support Activity. Rather than getting off of the plane at Rhein Main and going to the Bahnhof and taking a train to Garmisch, I decided to go through the Repo Depot and ended up in HQ TASCOM in Worms. It seems that they were impressed with my TS clearance.

BMT (RIP) · 10-08-2009, 09:49

TDY to Bangkok for 180 day's.
I worked in the J-3 Ops Center.
Worked 3 day's 7-7, then a day off.
Worked 3 night's 7-7, then 3 day's off.

BMT

SkiBumCFO · 10-08-2009, 10:07

I think i would have gone crazy in a compltely cushy assgt would have been bored to death. My last posting after being in about seven years was such a fantastic assgt (cushy enough but too much) that i told myself its time to get out as it cant get any better than this!!

Thats the problem with cushy you just know the odds will eventually work against you.

LarryW · 10-08-2009, 11:45

Quote:

Thats the problem with cushy you just know the odds will eventually work against you.

Yep. Been there.

Penn · 10-08-2009, 13:36

While stationed in Dugway PG, Utah "Testing Stuff", I was assign one week to pick up the girls for the dance ( it was known as the pig stomp) and escort them back to the base. This was a 180 mile RT in a blue bus; which turn out to be quite successful, as I had pick of the litter....wish I could remember the names!!!

Dozer523 · 10-08-2009, 13:56

Not exactly me, but the IL National Guard Infantry Company I'm with. They were mobilized right after 9-11 to pull security at Garmisch. For a year.

They made sure the Patton (or whatever replaced the Patton) was 'safe'. They have a great big "oh- thank- you-, we- never- could- have- survived- without- you" plaque on the wall by the main door. I was looking for a unit to join, took one look at that, and said, "Daddy's home!" These guys don't even ski!