On a roll....

[SP5IC]

From the Imus program,

A woman approached the window in the pharmacy and asked for strychnine. The pharmacist asked why she wanted the strychnine. She said, "To kill my husband." Aghast, the pharmacist replied, "You can't do that, it's illegal. Why you want to kill him?” he asked. “Just look at this picture and you'll see why,” she said. It was a snapshot of her husband in bed with the pharmacist’s wife. He immediately filled the request and refused to take any payment. “Why did you decide to honor my request?” she asked. “I didn’t know you had a prescription,” he responded.

[lksteve]

Miss Bea was in her 80’s and much admired for her sweetness and kindness to all. The pastor came to call on her one afternoon early in the spring and she welcomed him into her Victorian parlor. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared a little tea.

As he sat facing her old pump organ, the minister noticed a cut glass bowl setting on top of it, filled with water. In the water floated, of all things, a condom.

Imagine his shock and surprise. Imagine his curiosity, surely Miss Bea had flipped! But he certainly couldn’t mention the strange sight in her parlor.

When she returned with tea and cookies they began to chat. The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl and the strange floater, but soon, it got the best of him, and he could resist no longer. “Miss Bea,” he said, “I wonder if you would tell me about the, “Pointing to the bowl. “Oh yes”, she replied. “Isn’t it wonderful! I was walking down town last fall and I found this little package. It said to put it on your organ and keep it wet, and it would prevent disease. And you know, I think it is working, I haven’t had a cold all winter.”

[SP5IC]

I beg for it, and promise never to open this thread again.