IDIOT SIGHTING:

JJ_BPK · 04-22-2010, 07:20

Be afraid... VERY afraid!

IDIOT SIGHTING:

When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'it's open!'
His reply: 'I know. I already got that side.'

This was at the Ford dealership in Canton, MS

IDIOT SIGHTING:

We had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4.

He said, 'NO, it's not.' Four is larger than two.'

We haven't used Sears repair since.

IDIOT SIGHTING:

My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter.
She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back. She sighed and went to get the manager, who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said 'We're sorry but we could not do that kind of thing.'

The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change.

Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.

IDIOT SIGHTING:

I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road.

The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'

From Kingman , KS

IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE:

My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'

He said he was sorry, but they only had iceburg lettuce..

-- From Kansas City

IDIOT SIGHTING:

I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?' To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?'

He smiled knowingly and nodded, 'That's why we ask.'

Happened in Birmingham , Ala.

IDIOT SIGHTING:

The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.

Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'

She is a probation officer in Wichita, KS

IDIOT SIGHTING:

At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who was leaving the company due to 'downsizing,' our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We should do this more often.' Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.

This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.

IDIOT SIGHTING:

I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.

A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less.

IDIOT SIGHTING:

How would you pronounce this child's name?

"Le-a"

Leah?? NO
Lee - A?? NOPE
Lay - a?? NO
Lei?? Guess Again.

This child attends a school in Kansas City , Mo. Her mother is irate because everyone is getting her name wrong. It's pronounced "Ledasha." When the Mother was asked about the pronunciation of the name, she said, "the dash don't be silent."

STAY ALERT!

They walk among us...

and they VOTE

and REPRODUCE!

JJ_BPK · 04-22-2010, 09:49

Quote:

Originally Posted by NORMAL550GIRL

Please tell me these aren't real stories....

Consigliere, if I were able to guarantee the truthfulness of the individual's statements, I would have posted in the Soapbox.

Alas, I can not..

akv · 04-22-2010, 10:43

JJ_BPK,

Sir this is what I imagine the Democratic National Convention is like.

spherojon · 04-22-2010, 13:48

This happened to me last night,

Girl: "Ya, its going to be great, I get paid every two weeks instead of biweekly!"

Or at work,
Me: "Crap, we lost the footage."
Guy: "What are you guys shooting on?" (Shooting HD Cameras in a studio)
Me: "P2 Cards."
Guy: "Just rewind the tape then!"
Me: "It's a hard drive."
Guy: "Oh...Well rewind the hard drive then."

/facepalm

JJ_BPK · 04-22-2010, 14:10

Quote:

Originally Posted by spherojon

This happened to me last night,

Girl: "Ya, its going to be great, I get paid every two weeks instead of biweekly!"

/facepalm

Be careful,, Biweekly (Semi-weekly) can be twice a week or every other week (a fortnight or bimonthly),, while biennial is every other year and biannual is twice a yr..

Although unlikely, she may have been correct.

I had several lady friends that were paid by the hour...

219seminole · 04-22-2010, 15:19

When my wife was an OSUT company commander at Ft McClellan, twin sisters came through training: Latrina and Latrasha. As God is my witness, it is true.

Green Light · 04-22-2010, 15:58

Who makes up these names? Just put "La" in front of whatever they find on a random page in the dictionary?

spherojon · 04-22-2010, 16:04

Quote:

Originally Posted by JJ_BPK

I had several lady friends that were paid by the hour...

Ya, I have some lady friends too, but they have to pay for college somehow.

nmap · 04-22-2010, 18:38

Here's another group that seems to qualify for this thread.

LINK

I regard it as proof positive that we are utterly, absolutely doomed.

04-22-2010, 19:00

I stopped at a gas station I frequent last night, to get gas. Being a few days before payday. I had a handful of change in addition to the $13. I walk in, put the bills down and tell the lady, an older latina, "whatever it comes to on pump three." I have don't this plenty of times before, never been a problem. Usualy there is a ME type behind the counter.

The lady looked at the bills and change and exclaimed, "Oh this is too much, too much." So I counted out the change and said.."okay That is $14.64" She looked real confused and pushed the 4 pennies at me saying, again, "too much, you paid me too much". I gave up and pocketed the pennies. The pump cut off at exactly
$14.

PSM · 04-22-2010, 19:04

Quote:

Originally Posted by nmap

Here's another group that seems to qualify for this thread.

LINK

I regard it as proof positive that we are utterly, absolutely doomed.

I regard this as proof of a spoof.

Pat

nmap · 04-22-2010, 19:06

Quote:

Originally Posted by PSM

I regard this as proof of a spoof.

Pat

Please, let it be so.

**The Reaper** · 04-22-2010, 19:19

Quote:

Originally Posted by Green Light

Who makes up these names? Just put "La" in front of whatever they find on a random page in the dictionary?

That makes the name Phrench. Or is it Swahili?

TR

PSM · 04-22-2010, 19:22

Quote:

Originally Posted by nmap

Please, let it be so.

'Tis done, my son. Go, and sin no more.

Father Patrick

Mississippi10 · 04-23-2010, 11:03

This one is true. Coming home from vacation a few years ago, ready to be there, we stopped at Sonic for a "quick" pick-up. The carhop was obviously not the brightest; as the order came, my wife got out a $50. I told her, don't use that big a bill; it'll cost us fifteen minutes. My wife laughed and gave the girl the 50. It took the original carhop and two "managerial" types fifteen minutes to figure out change.