Go Back   Professional Soldiers ® > At Ease > The Comedy Zone

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 03-09-2009, 17:47   #1
BMT (RIP)
Quiet Professional
 
BMT (RIP)'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Red State
Posts: 3,774
SIGN'S

Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:

'Dr. Jones, at your cervix.


**************************

In a Podiatrist's office:

'Time wounds all heels.'

**************************

On a Septic Tank Truck:

Yesterday's Meals on Wheels

**************************

At a Proctologist's door:

'To expedite your visit, please back in.'

**************************

On a Plumber's truck:

'We repair what your husband fixed.'

**************************

On another Plumber's truck:

'Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.'

**************************

On a Church's Bill board:

'7 days without God makes one weak.'

**************************

At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee :

'Invite us to your next blowout.'

**************************

At a Towing company:

'We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows.'

**************************

On an Electrician's truck:

'Let us remove your shorts.'

**************************

In a Nonsmoking Area:

'If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action.'

**************************

On a Maternity Room door:

'Push. Push. Push.'

**************************

At an Optometrist's Office:

'If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place.'

**************************

On a Taxidermist's window:

'We really know our stuff.'

**************************

On a Fence:

'Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!'

**************************

At a Car Dealership:

'The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.'

**************************

Outside a Muffler Shop:

'No appointment necessary. We

hear you coming.'

**************************

In a Veterinarian's waiting room:

'Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!'

**************************

At the Electric Company

'We would be delighted if you send in your payment.

However, if you don't, you will be.'

**************************

In a Restaurant window:

'Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.'

**************************

In the front yard of a Funeral Home:

'Drive carefully. We'll wait.'

**************************

At a Propane Filling Station:

'Thank heaven for little grills.'

**************************

And don't forget the sign at a

CHICAGO RADIATOR SHOP:

'Best place in town to take a leak.'

**********************

Sign on the back of another
Septic Tank Truck:
'Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises'


BMT
__________________
Don't mess with old farts...age and treachery will always overcome youth and skill! Bullshit and brilliance only come with age and experience.
BMT (RIP) is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-09-2009, 18:10   #2
Alterflow
SF Candidate
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Ohio
Posts: 34
"Best place in town to take a leak" that one made me laugh out loud!
Alterflow is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-10-2009, 15:29   #3
swpa19
Guerrilla Chief
 
swpa19's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: south western pa.
Posts: 692
From my area:

"King of Floors" Remember we only lay the very best.

On I-70: LOVER EXIT
Exit only-no re-entry southbound
__________________
Special Forces Association A-593 Life
_______________________________
Don't hit at all if it is honorably possible to avoid hitting; but never hit soft.
Theodore Roosevelt
________________________________

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.
Aristotle
swpa19 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-10-2009, 16:17   #4
Longstreet
Guerrilla
 
Longstreet's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Canada
Posts: 334
I saw this one on a septic tank truck today: "We're number 1 in a number 2 business"


This one was not an ad, but I think it fits.
Attached Images
File Type: jpg funnysigns001.jpg (37.9 KB, 49 views)
__________________
I’ve come to a frightening conclusion that I am the decisive element in the classroom. It’s my personal approach that creates the climate. It’s my daily mood that makes the weather. As a teacher, I possess a tremendous power to make a child’s life miserable or joyous. I can be a tool of torture or an instrument of inspiration. I can humiliate or heal. In all situations, it is my response that decides whether a crisis will be escalated or de-escalated and a child humanized or dehumanized.
--Haim Ginott--
Longstreet is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-11-2009, 11:27   #5
BryanK
Guerrilla Chief
 
BryanK's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: VA
Posts: 859
A church in my area had "Exposure to the Son may prevent burning".
__________________
"1000 days of evasion are better than one day in captivity"

"Too many men work on parts of things. Doing a job to completion, satisfies me."- Richard Proenneke
BryanK is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump



All times are GMT -6. The time now is 19:15.



Copyright 2004-2022 by Professional Soldiers ®
Site Designed, Maintained, & Hosted by Hilliker Technologies