Go Back   Professional Soldiers ® > At Ease > The Comedy Zone

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 06-26-2008, 04:50   #1
BryanK
Guerrilla Chief
 
BryanK's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: VA
Posts: 859
Squawks

"Squawks" are problem listings that pilots generally leave for maintenance crews to fix before the next flight. Here are some squawks submitted by US Air Force pilots and the replies from the maintenance crews.

(P)=PROBLEM (S)=SOLUTION

(P) Left inside main tire almost needs replacement
(S) Almost replaced left inside main tire

(P) Test flight OK, except autoland very rough
(S) Autoland not installed on this aircraft

(P) #2 Propeller seeping prop fluid
(S) #2 Propeller seepage normal - #1 #3 and #4 propellers
lack normal seepage

(P) Something loose in cockpit
(S) Something tightened in cockpit

(P) Evidence of leak on right main landing gear
(S) Evidence removed

(P) DME volume unbelievably loud
(S) Volume set to more believable level

(P) Dead bugs on windshield
(S) Live bugs on order

(P) Autopilot in altitude hold mode produces a 200 fpm descent
(S) Cannot reproduce problem on ground

(P) IFF inoperative
(S) IFF always inoperative in OFF mode
(IFF-Identification Friend or Foe)

(P) Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick
(S) That's what they're there for

(P) Number three engine missing
(S) Engine found on right wing after brief search

(P) Aircraft handles funny
(S) Aircraft warned to straighten up, "fly right" and be serious!

(P) Target Radar hums
(S) Reprogrammed Target Radar with the lyrics
__________________
"1000 days of evasion are better than one day in captivity"

"Too many men work on parts of things. Doing a job to completion, satisfies me."- Richard Proenneke
BryanK is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-26-2008, 09:55   #2
PSM
Area Commander
 
PSM's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Cochise Co., AZ
Posts: 6,204
Why's this in the comedy forum?

Pat
__________________
"Hector Lives!"

"The limits of tyrants are prescribed by the endurance of those whom they oppress." -- Frederick Douglass

"The bigger the government, the smaller the citizen." -- Dennis Prager

"The urge to save humanity is almost always only a false-face for the urge to rule it." --H.L. Mencken
PSM is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-26-2008, 10:12   #3
BryanK
Guerrilla Chief
 
BryanK's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: VA
Posts: 859
Tough crowd.
__________________
"1000 days of evasion are better than one day in captivity"

"Too many men work on parts of things. Doing a job to completion, satisfies me."- Richard Proenneke
BryanK is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-26-2008, 21:24   #4
PSM
Area Commander
 
PSM's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Cochise Co., AZ
Posts: 6,204
Quote:
Originally Posted by Broadsword2004 View Post
I don't know if that autoland one is true or not, but that would be really hilarious if it actually happened

It's true. He took a personal day:
Attached Images
File Type: jpg otto.jpg (9.8 KB, 24 views)
__________________
"Hector Lives!"

"The limits of tyrants are prescribed by the endurance of those whom they oppress." -- Frederick Douglass

"The bigger the government, the smaller the citizen." -- Dennis Prager

"The urge to save humanity is almost always only a false-face for the urge to rule it." --H.L. Mencken
PSM is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-29-2008, 11:41   #5
hunteran
Guerrilla
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Pace, Florida
Posts: 124
Thumbs up

Quote:
Originally Posted by PSM View Post
It's true. He took a personal day:
Great movie.
hunteran is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-01-2008, 18:13   #6
The Reaper
Quiet Professional
 
The Reaper's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Free Pineland
Posts: 24,823
Quote:
Originally Posted by Broadsword2004 View Post
What movie was that?
Airplane.

TR
__________________
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat." - President Theodore Roosevelt, 1910

De Oppresso Liber 01/20/2025
The Reaper is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump



All times are GMT -6. The time now is 21:43.



Copyright 2004-2022 by Professional Soldiers ®
Site Designed, Maintained, & Hosted by Hilliker Technologies