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Old 01-05-2022, 11:12   #92
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Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: State of Confusion
Posts: 5,513
Originally Posted by rsdengler View Post
Hahahaha....And if it's going to happen, you most likely will be first contact...
Mankind had better hope that I am not the first contact - it will not turn out the way people think it should.

Social media as a platform to mobilize political protest and activism would be the nothing compared to the new era that will be ushered in if I ever become the Dark Overlord of the Known Universe.

I would move my base of operations to planet Nibiru and every time something stupid went out on social media, every puny earthling would get zapped simultaneously with my Galactic Space-Tazer.
...two or seven zaps from my Galactic Space-Tazer and these puny earth dwellers would finally start to police themselves.

Or they wouldn't.
Eventually - if the noncompliance on social media continued - I would simply doom everyone to a lifetime inside of a rubber Mark Suckerberg suit and the only thing on TV would be reruns of RuPauls Drag Race.
...and the only meal choices will be Vegan BBQ ribs made out of Seitan and Jackfruit for earth's meat eaters and rare cooked select grade ground beef patties for earth's vegans.

I will not be denied!
Opinions stated in this post are solely those of the author, and in no way reflect the opinions or policies of The Department of Defense, The United States Army, The Royal Canadian Mounted Police, The Screen Actors Guild, The Boy Scouts, The Good, The Bad, or The Ugly. These opinions are provided purely as overly sarcastic social commentary and are not meant to be used for mission planning or navigation.

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