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Old 06-22-2022, 15:01   #1
Box
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Join Date: Feb 2004
Location: State of Confusion
Posts: 5,747
Movie Sequels that we don’t need…

Urban Cowboy 2

It’s been 40 years since Buford Uan, and Sissy Davis first tied the knot. They are both pushing 60 and haven’t been to a ‘Honky Tonk’ since the kids were born. The last ten years or so have been rough on the couple. Bud‘s affinity for traditional gender roles has always been the rough spot with his feisty ‘grrrl power’ wife, Sissy but the culture wars of the Obama-Trump era have pushed their relationship to the breaking point. The couples life is a bit topsy turvy after countless liberal attacks on the fossil fuel industry caused the local refinery to shut down. After decades as the family breadwinner – Bud is now out of work and has no other skills to fall back on. Sissy has spent the last 40 years as a social butterfly drifting between countless jobs normally considered “male jobs” but never really found a career that “fit”
…she had to quit her tow truck driving job late in her pregnancy with their first child.
…she briefly worked in construction but kept hurting her shoulder carrying 2x4’s
…she quit her job as a firefighter after hurting her back during her second pregnancy
…Spur High School in Texas fired her from her coaching job when the the "Bulldogs" realized she didn’t know shit about football

Bud finally got rid of his Pick-Up truck during the Obama administrations “Cash for Clunkers” program and now their “Bud” and “Sissy” license plates can be found in the back window of their 2009, 2WD Toyota Tacoma Extended Cab pickup truck. Sissy’s 1967 Mustang was featured on an episode of Motor Trends reality TV show, “Garage Squad” after spending 23 years in the same barn that used to house Uncle Buds mechanical bull but she has already wrecked it twice and burned out the transmission after showing the other wives how her 'Stang can chirp the tires in every gear...

Their oldest daughter, “Rayne” became a climate change activist that protested at her dads refinery until the day it was finally put out of business…
…she left home when he lost his job and has not been in touch with her parents since. It is rumored that she tried to start a community tomato garden on the sidewalk outside of the East Precinct building during the Capitol Hill Autonomous Zone protests back in 2020.

Their middle child – Alexa – was assigned male at birth but realized that gender was just a patriarchal social construct and transitioned from Alex to Alexa after realizing it was the only way to place first at a college swim meet.

Their youngest daughter 'Pepper' has purple hair and hasn't said an intelligible word since Trump stole the election from Hillary.

Bud drifts from job to job – never quite able to regain the financial success he had working at the refinery – spending his nights swilling six pack after six pack of Lone Star Beer – wondering how his life would have turned out if he’d stayed with Pam…


...in fact – maybe instead of a sequel, we turn this porridge of fossil fuel, dysfunctional family life, cheap booze, and toxic masculinity into a TV series?
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Last edited by Box; 06-22-2022 at 15:04.
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