[Roguish Lawyer]

Originally Posted by Box

This guy is the real deal - the realest.

In fact, back when I was still serving undercover as a Special Forces Underwater Demolitions and Weapons Medical Specialist in the 4th Special Ranger Group, we did several solo missions together. We grew up in different neighborhoods together, we went to different high schools together, we served in different units together, and we went on one-man deep insertion solo operations together.

I'm not just talking routine deep cover black ops - I'm talking VANTABLACK ops - not this PowerPoint slide deck crap that most of you losers were doing in the 'Stan - I'm talking real deal, no shit, there I was, surrounded by used hand grenade pins and broken bayonet blades. This guy has been in the shit. He has seen the elephant.

This guy is at the top of the food chain.
In fact, he taught me everything I know about storytelling.

Let me tell you guys something - any time the military has an operation that can't fail, they call this guy in to train the troops.

He's the kind of guy that would drink a gallon of gasoline so he could piss in your campfire! You could drop this guy off at the Arctic Circle wearing a pair of bikini underwear, without his toothbrush, and tomorrow afternoon he's going to show up at your poolside with a million-dollar smile and fist full of pesos.

This guy's a professional, you got me?

LMAO