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According to most researchers, Airsoft lived in Delphi in the year 2500 BC (Before Clinton). Airsoft is best known for his educational fables – most of his stories recounted the actions of common folk, supernatural animals, and inanimate objects that would speak, solve problems, and generally display oddly bizarre behavior. One of my favorite of Airsofts Fables when I was growing up was the story of The Non-Gender Specific Protestor That Cried Racist…

A non-gender specific protestor was participating in a peaceful riot near a private business not far from his own subdivision. Soon the non-gender specific protestor found life in the peaceful protest very dull. All the protestor could do for amusement was to play on a smartphone or toke on a crack pipe.

One day as the non-gender specific protestor sat watching the other sheep starting fires during the peaceful protest, the protestor started to wonder what would happen if a racist showed up at a peaceful protest - so the protestor immediately devised a plan for some self-amusement.

The community organizer had always told the protestors to call out “racist” if anyone with differing opinions should ever question the narrative of the flock so the Social Justice Warriors could come along and cancel them for questioning liberal narratives. So even though the non-gender specific protestor had not seen anything that even looked like a racist, the protestor ran through the crowd shouting as loud as possible, “Racist!! Racist!!”

As expected, the CNN reporters that heard the cry dropped their work and ran with great excitement in hopes of getting a video clip or soundbite for the 6 O’clock news. When they got there, they found the protestor doubled up with laughter at how easy it was to make fools out of field reporters. To cover their embarrassment, the reporters simply reported that the burning cars, shattered store windows, and constant parade of peaceful protestors with large screen TV’s were really just white supremacists paid by right wing talk show hosts to riot and blame the chaos on peaceful protestors…

A few days later the child again shouted, " Racist!! Racist!!” and again, the field reporters simply reported that the burning cars, shattered store windows, and parade of peaceful protestors with large screen TV’s were really just white supremacists paid by right wing talk show hosts to riot and blame the chaos on peaceful protestors…

The child continued this charade for days on end and every time, the field reporters simply reported that the burning cars, shattered store windows, the parade of peaceful protestors with large screen TV’s, and the rascals carrying cases of beer and cigarettes from the burning Circle-K were really just white supremacists paid by right wing talk show hosts to riot and blame the chaos on peaceful protestors…

Politicians began to kneel before the cameras to virtue signal how woke they were to believe the lying little attention-starved protestors even though it had become obvious that “Strange things are afoot at the Circle-K” Then one evening as the sun was setting behind the smoking remains of the urban landscape, a racist really did spring from the shadows and fell upon the non-gender specific protestor like a tankful of angry stingrays on the Crocodile Hunter.

In terror, the non-gender specific protestor ran toward the liberal field reporters shouting "Racist!! Racist!!” The CNN field reporters jumped with glee as they fired up their cameras to record the epic ass whipping being levied against the protestor…
…"Racist!! Racist!! Racist!! Racist!!” the non-gender specific protestor screamed in hopes of getting help form the media but alas, the media knew all along that the non-gender specific protestor was full of more shit than a 1000-gallon septic tank. The field reporter and camera crew were only there to get a video clip of a racist beating up a protestor.

The mob jumped on the racist and tore him apart like flying monkeys on a talking scarecrow. The CNN news crew recorded their footage, left the non-gender specific protestor beaten, bruised, and curled up in a ball on the dirty urine-stained sidewalk like a muddy poncho liner after a three-day patrol in the swamps. The news crew jumped in their van and high tailed it back to the gentrified section of town where they knew they were safe…

For the next three weeks the news station ran the video clip non-stop to prove that the violence at the peaceful protest was being caused by conservative talk radio and the NRA.

The moral of the story – if you go to a riot and instigate trouble – you might just get fucked up and left in the gutter.