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Ugh, I just hit the age where I'm supposed to do that. Who invented ass cancer anyway? I mean, why didn't they come up with, oh I don't know, thumb cancer.
"Hey, you're 50 now. You need to stick your thumb in this machine. C'mon, everyone is doing it, don't be a baby. There's a good lad."
"Right, no worries, here you go. Hey, that didn't hurt a bit and my dignity is still intact."
But nooo...
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Grando autem duodecimo hominis
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