[Jack Moroney (RIP)]

Well actually at this time of year it is hard to tell. Right about now there is absolutely no way to tell the sex of an individual until the spring thaw. All you see are extremely bundled, amorphous shapes moving slowly thru the snow covered walks and roads with whisps of breath that condense as it eeks thru the scarfs, closed hoods, and ski masks which betray that they are really alive. It is also the time on non-verbal communication. Folks just pass one another with a slight rise of the hand, a nod, grunt or shrug. It is like they are afraid the cold weather is going to either crack their teeth or freeze their beards to the zipper on their coat if they attempt to speak. It is also the time we start getting all the really obnoxious calls right at dinner time to help those less fortunate than we. My usual answer is that I would be willing to sell them det cord so that they can blast the frozen gargabe can lids loose so that they can feed themselves. Then they get irate, then I get nastier and ask why is it that they can get money for booze and cigarettes but not enough money to feed themselves. Yep, gets down right interesting up here. My favorite phone call was from the DOVE organization yesterday which my wife took. This pitch was to stop all the fowl language in the family. Before I could off the lad a cup of shut the f... up Judy hung up the phone.

Jack Moroney-the compassionate