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As a Licensed "Shrink" for 20 years, I have dealt with a mulitude of marital conflicts--in some the woman is the aggressor/instigater, in many it is the man who resorts first to threats, intimidation and/or violence. I agree that it needs to be looked at on a case-by-case basis.
I also agree that POs/TROs are pretty useless, except that they MAY be able to demonstrate one person's willingness to use force/intimidation. I personally recommend that the person in the most danger get a PO, as well as get training and get themselves a sidearm.
There have been occasions where I and my family (who live near-by) have gone to threat-condition Red due to violent spouses of my mental health patients, and I routinely carry even during Therapy sessions......
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