Originally Posted by Dozer523
It usually takes more than a few words and stirring retorical cadence to get me going (that may be something I should run by the group during our next 50 minute hour) but, this one has always worked for me. WP, when the tough going gets . . . wait . . . I mean when the going gets tough, here:
My American fellows, the office that I hold has its ups and downs, its windfalls, as well as its various duties. And it is in the performance of the most trying of these duties that I speak with you today, to illustrate to my countrymen a harsh, inescapable truth. A storm is gathering, ladies and gentlemen. And in the gloaming darkness lurk the contents of our own nightmares. There is no denying that in the coming days, the coming hours even, we Americans will be tested. We will know pain and loss. There will probably be some disembowelings. But we have been tested before. In a Red-Coated New England winter, we were tested. On the fields of Shiloh, we gripped wood and steel and cloth. And today will be no different. My fellow Americans, today, I offer up this, joyful, hallowed refrain—one that you have no doubt heard on many other, happier, occasions; one that will forever have new meaning after today. My fellow Americans, look under your chairs. Your government has distributed among each and every one of you a Phase-IV Energy Rifle. Yes, that is correct. You get a rifle. And you get a rifle. Glen Fullerton of Des Moines, Iowa gets a rifle. As does little Suzy Hutchins of Passaic, New Jersey, who has to ride the train three hours a day to get to her magnet school. You all get rifles. And with them we will beat back the coming darkness. Their gamma rays shall light up the sky, signaling a new screaming birth for our triumphant nation. Americans who are my fellows, history shall remember this day with new meaning as the day our nation saw the flickering candle of freedom and relit it by the light of its people's courageous torches. This is our Arbor Day.
(Stolen from a Groupon ad because I like cupcakes.)
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