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Do you remember Black Hawk Down? Most of the Delta operators wives didn't know they were actually gone. Their mail was still postmarked with Ft. Bragg postmarks. How do I know this, I was stationed at Smoke Bomb Hill down the road from SF and SOCOM. There were many articles in the Fayetteville Observer after the battle about those had died.
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Because the wives are so dense that they didn't notice their husbands weren't home for dinner

Man people underestimate the wives. Our husbands may not tell us everything, but it doesn't mean we don't know a thing or two.