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Wal-Mart Greeter
A very loud, unattractive, mean-acting woman walks into WalMart with her two kids in tow, screaming obscenities at them all the way through the entrance.
The WalMart Greeter says, "Good morning and welcome to Walmart .... Nice children you've got there - are they twins?"
The ugly woman stops screaming long enough to say, "Hell no they ain't, the oldest one, he's 9 and the younger one, she's 7. Why the hell would you think they're twins?........ Do you really think they look alike?"
"No", replies the greeter, "I just couldn't believe you got laid twice!"
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