US Army Runs Out Of Codenames
 

From http://www.bbspot.com

USA Runs Out Of Codenames

By Danny Aytekin

As fighting intensified in the Middle East and Afghanistan last month, it emerged that the Pentagon had run out of scary codenames for its operations.

"We had planned in detail a combined air and artillery strike on a quiet hillside full of weeds," said General Ryan H. Core, a soldier serving in Iraq, last week.

Research conducted by the War College has found that every single permutation of aggressive words has now been used up. The only permutations remaining are of words drawn from themes unrelated to successful military activity, such as the colloquialism used on the 1980s San Francisco gay scene.

"As we retired towards the lounge to think of a new name, we realised that there just wouldn’t be one, with or without the word desert in.� The general was forced to use some song lyrics by the popular singer Britney Spears.

“Hit me baby one more time,� concluded Gen. Core, after it had appeared that the interview had finished.

Officers recruited from college have long complained that many codenames chosen since the first Gulf War were passé. The name of Operation Mountain Storm, which took place recently on the border between Afghanistan and Pakistan, had already been used more than forty different times, including once by Noah.

Such reuse is now banned.

Army officials denied that simple overactivity was the reason for the crisis, citing the trend of too many operation names being allocated to too many wartime efforts.

In particular, a captain based in Basra became notorious by insisting that his men’s nightly visits to their barracks’ pit latrine be designated a military campaign, codenamed Operation Toilet Storm.

Back in Iraq, Operation Argh My Leg, My Fricking Leg was scheduled to start sometime on Tuesday.

At first, I thought that it said that "the US Army ran out of condoms". No more deployments to "friendly countries". :eek: