Top five list of Stupidest individual military equipment

[sinjefe]

Had a discussion at work the other day on the stupidest gear the military issued to it's soldiers.

Here is my top five:

Shelter Half: A device that required two personnel to put together, but completely non functional by itself.

Field Jacket: The jacket that neither stopped rain nor actually kept you warm. Of course, made of water absorbing cotton.

VB (Mickey Mouse) Boots: Useless unless pulling guard in -50

Pile Cap: The pile cap is on the list, not because it isn't warm, but because it makes the wearer look completely retarded.

Yellow PT Uniform (aka banana suit): CIF never issued a soldier this uniform in the right size. They were always two sizes too small. Thus, when you had to wear them, the entire formation looked like they had been "shoe-horned" into a full body version of speedo's banana hammock.

Anyone have any addtions to the list or something as. or more, stupid?

[miclo18d]

L-Angle Flashlight - If you could get it to work, how were you supposed to keep it on your LBE? D-Batteries, Size, luminosity. Awful. I'd rather carry a medieval torch or lantern.

[Kyobanim]

Originally Posted by sinjefe

Had a discussion at work the other day on the stupidest gear the military issued to it's soldiers.

Here is my top five:

Shelter Half: A device that required two personnel to put together, but completely non functional by itself.

Field Jacket: The jacket that neither stopped rain nor actually kept you warm. Of course, made of water absorbing cotton.

VB (Mickey Mouse) Boots: Useless unless pulling guard in -50

Pile Cap: The pile cap is on the list, not because it isn't warm, but because it makes the wearer look completely retarded.

Yellow PT Uniform (aka banana suit): CIF never issued a soldier this uniform in the right size. They were always two sizes too small. Thus, when you had to wear them, the entire formation looked like they had been "shoe-horned" into a full body version of speedo's banana hammock.

Anyone have any addtions to the list or something as. or more, stupid?

I can't stop laughing! Thanks for this!

[33army]

I was issued Green Laser Protective Ballistic Eye protection while in 3ID. I think that explains itself.

[Dusty]

Originally Posted by miclo18d

L-Angle Flashlight - If you could get it to work, how were you supposed to keep it on your LBE? D-Batteries, Size, luminosity. Awful. I'd rather carry a medieval torch or lantern.

Everywhere I went, the indig loved those things.

I thought the cunt cap was the dumbest thing I was ever issued.

[Destrier]

Acu digital cammo pattern and the color it came it.

[ddoering]

Originally Posted by Dusty

Everywhere I went, the indig loved those things.

I thought the cunt cap was the dumbest thing I was ever issued.

Along with low-quarters.

I love my pile cap btw.

[Badger52]

Originally Posted by Dusty

I thought the cunt cap was the dumbest thing I was ever issued.

Ditto; until that gay-ass minty-green shirt for my Class A's...

[PSM]

Originally Posted by Dusty

I thought the cunt cap was the dumbest thing I was ever issued.

I thought so too, until I had to wrangle my service cap on a flight from Ft. Polk to San Francisco. That was the last time I wore it except for inspections.

Pat

[Ret10Echo]

"issued' but not necessariy CIF stuff.

Dress uniform:

- Black overcoat.... Shapeless sack that I never wore. (Not to mention those that wore it off-duty and looked really creepy)

- Class-A Gloves....Worn as often as the overcoat.

-Garrison cap...with glider patch (facing which way??)

Field kit

-Ecotat...Never used the thing and I think I was the only one on the team to actually have the poles for it.

Misc.

-Gray Army sweatshirt...A zipper you weren't allowed to unzip, a hood you couldn't wear and pockets you couldn't put your hands in. I bought a gray pullover with "Army" on the front.

[Dusty]

Never wore the heavy green wool shirt-looking thing either.

On the flip side, I still have and frequently use my boonie cap, wool pullover, field jacket liner, poncho and liner, ALICE ruck, asspack, wingwalkers, jungle hotel and canteen cup, and I've been out damn near twenty years.

[sinjefe]

Originally Posted by Dusty

Never wore the heavy green wool shirt-looking thing either.

On the flip side, I still have and frequently use my boonie cap, wool pullover, field jacket liner, poncho and liner, ALICE ruck, asspack, wingwalkers, jungle hotel and canteen cup, and I've been out damn near twenty years.

Okay, Dusty, stick to "stupidest things" not smartest things. The smartest thing list is pretty short.

[Dusty]

Originally Posted by sinjefe

Okay, Dusty, stick to "stupidest things" not smartest things. The smartest thing list is pretty short.

Roger.

Butter bars.

[miclo18d]

Okay, some commo guys might slam me (or praise me) for this but here goes.

KL-43 -- Hand held Encryption/Decription Device -- A 5 Lb Paper weight that forces you to find 10 different menus to send one message.

It held only a few messages of a certain length, that you had to find and erase to make a new msg.

It sucked over HF (DMDG was better for goodness sakes)

Keyboard was so small and not illuminated for night you'd be lucky if you weren't sending recipes to your commander instead of SALUTE reports.

The crypto keys TEK and KEK were confusing, didn't last long, and were impossible to get loaded.

My head is hurting just remembering it!

[blue02hd]

Army Values Card.